Selected Gershwin Blingees

Welcome back. . . George.

Gershwin is a time traveller - you can see him out of the corner of your eye. He did not die in the normal sense of the word, because he did not know where he was. He was in a very high fever and dying all alone in a hospital room after failed brain surgery. When he left his body, he experienced extreme disorientation and for quite a while did not realize he was dead. This meant that a light, loose Gershwin-shaped energy field still moved about the world, and lit up whenever his music was played (which was almost all the time). After a very long time, though it was a mere moment in eternity, he began to realize who and how he actually was, that he was no longer in a body and would have to exist in a very different form. Being a soul sojourner from the beginning, this was not a threat but an adventure to him. But even in spite of this necessary metamorphosis, to a remarkable degree, he retained a George Gershwin shape. No matter what sort of problems he was having in his life, and he had many that we don't know anything about, there was a ferocious static-charged supernatural pumped boost of energy that somehow kept on connecting people with each other when he was around. But ironically, in spite of his sacred mission to join people joyously,in his life he had many struggles with intimacy, which led to a loneliness even as he was the most popular man in the room. During this strange leaving-his-body-and-not-being-sure-where-he-was period, he began to have extraordinary insight into not just his own condition, but the human condition. GG's emotional affect and his emotions seemed curiously light, but there was a galaxy of melancholy within that he did not show to too many people. The stars in that galaxy exploded out of his fingers and his brain and were made manifest as notes of music on the page. Though he lived at a hurtling pace few people could equal, little did he know that he was absorbing all of humanity's travails, gaining an understanding of suffering that would not be fully realized until he found himself in a different form outside his body. It would have been unbearably painful, had his life (as he knew it) not been over, a blessed cessation of all earthly pain. When a soul or entity gains this sort of awareness, mysterious alchemy takes place because the need here on earth for that level of understanding is so dire. Those pained and anguished places in that broken thing we call the human condition began to draw and attract this generous, gentle, deeply broken spirit. There was Gershwin dust in the room sifting down like stardust, particularly when there was music playing. And there was music playing a lot. Someone, not keeping up their guard, felt something strange or warm and not quite familiar in the room, yet also hauntingly familiar. Someone else thought they saw him for a second, or someone that looked like him. There was in some subconscious way a powerful sense that a healing was beginning to happen. As the entity begins to heal, so it heals itself. George's brain gave way, the most disturbing way to die, so that he was basically humbled by losing the genius brain he was celebrated for. Stripped of that, even of that, all that was left was his essence. How can I say how this happens? How can I be sure that George Gershwin is a time traveller and an entity who is basically free to move about within time and space wherever and whenever he wishes?

Mental health: how the medical community shames patients

Blogger's note: Teragram G, who is my "identical cousin" and mirror image in virtually every way, posted this message on her local lab review page. She had something to say about something important.

Something VERY upsetting happened to me the last time I handed in my bloodwork requisition. I have bipolar disorder and am on several medications to treat it. We had to discuss my lithium level, and I happened to mention that I would be gradually weaning off it. The technician looked up at me with a big beaming smile on her face and said, "Ohhh, GOOD!". 

I did not know how to interpret this. Did she mean, "oh, good, you don't have bipolar disorder any more"? Did she mean, "oh, good, you're doing so well now you don't need to take THOSE kinds of drugs"? Almost everyone with bipolar disorder NEEDS to take "those kinds of drugs", and in fact it is what keeps us well. If I said I was coming off heart medication, diabetic medication, or ANY other kind of medication, I very much doubt if it would have prompted a big, pleased, "way to go!" congratulatory smile, as if I had finally graduated, gotten it together and left all that "stuff" behind. 

Diabetics aren't praised for coming off insulin, in fact, it might even be seen as dangerous. But coming off a psych med seems to automatically mean I MUST be doing "better" - in other words, showing no overt signs of my illness. If I AM showing overt signs of my illness, by that logic, I'd get the opposite of praise, perhaps silent or even not-so-silent disapproval. 

By the way, I am only weaning off this very useful drug due to a kidney condition. I would prefer to stay on it for life, but I can't. It has been an upsetting and very difficult process to get off it, with many setbacks. But why this dismaying and insensitive response? Is it because lithium is an inherently stigmatized drug, in that absolutely everyone knows what it is for? 

It has taken me DECADES to accept the fact that I will always be on psychiatric meds, and I still struggle with the reality of it. I don't like to go to the pharmacy and have people comment on how many bottles I have to pay for, and how I could overcome all that stuff with Herbalife if I really tried. When my mental health is misunderstood and undermined by health care professionals who should be helping me (and should know better), it's very distressing, demoralizing, and adds to the stigma everyone claims should be abolished. 

This is why people with mental health issues feel so much shame and don't "reach out for help" as they are always told to do. No one should EVER be praised for going off lithium or going off ANY other kind of drug, particularly psychiatric drugs which people casually make cruel jokes about ("oh, she's off her meds"). Please speak to staff about this, as I walked away feeling like s***. It should never happen to anyone else.

"She was a one-date girl"

Perhaps she's ill . . . perhaps she's only "nervous"

"NERVES" Hasten the Coming of "CROWS FEET"

Nervous Women are the First to Lose their Youth and Charm

Leading beauty experts agree that overstrained "NERVES" do more to bring the lines of age to the face and ruin a woman's beauty and complexion than any other cause. When your "NERVES" get beyond control, your beauty vanishes - charm fades - and "crow's feet" and other age lines creep into your face. Headaches, Sleeplessness, Neuralgia, Dyspepsia and similar troubles are frequently caused by overstrained nerves. Any woman who is nervous, blue or irritable soon loses her attractiveness and begins to look old. Don't neglect your "NERVES" if you want to keep your youth and charm. Whenever you feel nervous - 

Quiet Your Nerves This Delightful Way

Just drop a Dr. Miles Effervescent NERVINE tablet into a glass of water and as it bubbles up like sparkling spring water - drink it. See how promptly it soothes and calms you. You'll like the pleasant, refreshing, relief, this delightful drink gives. Get a large package of Dr. Miles' Effervescent NERVINE Tablets at any drug store for $1.00. If they do not give you satisfactory relief, go to the druggist and get your dollar back.

Perhaps she’s ILL. . . Perhaps she’s only NERVOUS

After childbirth, many years ago, I was very nervous and could not sleep nights. My husband got me a bottle of Dr. Miles Nervine. I took one dose and went to sleep. When I woke up next morning, I felt much better. I continued to take nervine until I felt as well as ever.  Mrs. Bedfell

The night you dread re those nights when you are free from pain yet cannot sleep. You toss and tumble; minutes seem like hours; you brood over real or fancied mistakes; instead of a delightful drowsy feeling, each minute finds you more “keyed-up” and wakeful. Next day you are dull and restless. Your eyes burn and your head aches.

Try Dr. Miles Nervine when you are Restless or Cranky, when you can’t Sleep, or have Nervous Indigestion or Nervous Headache.

Get Dr. Miles Nervine at any drug store.

Small package – 25 cents

Large package - $1.00

Dr. Miles Nervine

Liquid or Effervescent Tablets

HE USED TO THROW DISHES AT HIS NURSE

During four months in the hospital, I became so nervous and irritable that I often threw dishes at the Nurse.

He is not nearly so irritable since he started to use DR. MILES NERVINE. Outbursts of temper are, more often than not, caused by "NERVES". The nervous man or woman is a nuisance, not only to himself, but to all with whom he comes in contact.

Tense nerves cause - 

Sleeplessness, Nervous Irritability, Nervous Headache, Nervous Indigestion.

You can't do effective work when you are nervous. You can't enjoy yourself and you are no addition to a party.

DR. MILES NERVINE (Liquid  or Effervescent Tablets) is not habit-forming and does not depress the heart.

Why don't you try it? Your money will be refunded if you are not entirely satisfied with the results.

DR. MILES NERVINE

The Saga of Polly: from FAT to FABULOUS!

Jazz Cat (for Bill Prouten)

JAZZ CAT

a true jazz cat can live in the moment

able to duly see

the sweet mauve haze of an unadorned blessing

the fruit of an angel tree

and when he plays he plays like a tiger

a jungle cat slinking wild

and when he plays he moves like a cobra

and laughs like a wayward child

there is no now just a moving abstraction

there is no then or when

there is an is, unfolding in rhythm

in which we are born again

it’s true that some hearts chime to the music 

it’s true that some cats know

and play the pulse of divine recreation

(as above. . . so below)

The Invention of the Saxophone

i don’t know who invented this 

reflexive question mark of an instrument 

but i think it was a good thing 

for it’s great to look at, 

with fat keys like frog eyes 

and a big bell like royal jelly 

you could keep flowers in there if you wanted to, 

extra socks 

or even a clock 

Snakes kink too 

and this sound is snakey 

purply mauve as the deepest bruise 

and raunchy 

as a man in love 

smoked as some cat of the night 

disappearing over a fence 

it makes leaps 

(but only because it has to) 

There is no 

morning saxophone 

this is a sound that 

pulls the shades down 

a hangover 

howl 

fading to twilight 

or the blackmost 

belly button 

of the night 

Few can wrap their lips around 

this gooseneck 

without some harm coming to them 

for this is an instrument 

with a long history of 

hollowing out 

all but the most hardy 

Bird flew into a pane 

of glass and was 

smashed 

we don’t know why it does this to people 

(maybe it was mad at him 

for taking it all to such extremes) 

but how could you blow this thing 

halfway 

i ask you 

how could you rear back 

in some great pained whiplash of the spine 

without a sense of 

terrible commitment 

i never much cared for 

saxophones myself 

until i heard one blown correctly at last 

jazz is a genre i will never understand 

but perhaps that’s good 

for like the priesthood, one must enter into it 

without question 

reservation 

or doubt