Tuesday, January 5, 2016
"Cleanse that taco!" The taco cleanse diet
The Taco Cleanse Is a Real Diet — and Involves Eating Tacos All Day
01/04/2016 AT 01:31 PM ET
LIVIA CORONA/GETTY
Now, here’s a cleanse we can get behind.
Thanks to the self-proclaimed “taco scientists” and authors of the new book The Taco Cleanse, there’s finally a new trendy diet plan that aligns with our kind of New Year’s resolution.
Creators Wes Allison, Stephanie Bogdanich, Molly R. Frisinger and Jessica Morris developed the book after eating tacos for breakfast, lunch and dinner for 30 days straight—and are encouraging others to do the same.
RELATED: Alex Guarnaschelli Blogs: Win Taco Tuesday with These Garlic Shrimp and Avocado Tacos
The scientists provide all the necessities for following a taco-based lifestyle including five recipes for tortillas (there’s a waffle version!), over 35 vegan recipes for fillings and all the fixings to compliment them.
While the detox plan doesn’t promise weight loss, there are plenty of other benefits.
“A taco consumed within three hours of waking, colloquially called a ‘breakfast taco,’ has been anecdotally proven to erase the ill effects of the previous night’s toxic indulgence. A midday taco frequently results in more positive physical effects,” reads the book. “The spicy taco consumed prior to sleep stimulates the nocturnal imagination and has been used by taco spiritualists to induce prophetic dreams.”
RELATED: These Celebrities Love Tacos Just as Much as You Do
So is the Taco Cleanse right for you? If the debut of the taco emoji was the highlight of your 2015, it’s safe to say the answer is definitely yes.
—Ana Calderone, @anacalderone
Blogger's stupid comments. Oh I don't know. Whatever somebody tells me to do, I do the opposite - write an erudite, interesting blog (no, write THIS one!); eat veggies (eat garbage). Get a dog (get a cat). So if someone tells me to eat tacos all day long for no discernible reason (they admit it doesn't help you lose weight), what am I going to do? Eat an anti-taco? Anti-eat a taco? (Don't want to think about that one!). Eat an ocat? Coat? Toca? Acot? Oact? Cato? Ctao? Tao C? O, act? A cot? O, cat? And other things.
Today I left a comment on someone's Facebook page. There was an article posted called Four Steps to Keeping A Safe and Tidy Blog, or something like that - distressingly bland. I said in my comment that I thought the most important thing about blogging was to post an entry every day, so the thing doesn't run down, lie fallow or crap out. The response was, "no, I don't think you should post EVERY day because you need time to work on your poetry, novel, or non-fiction book."
Having jumped into the macerator three times, and come away with less self-esteem each time, I am convinced I DO know how to write, but don't know how to successfully publish/sell books, which is what it all comes down to. No one ever mentions this on FB. All these aspiring writers just assume that when they finally finish their masterpiece, it will leap up on top of the New York Times Bestseller List all by itself. No, really - NO one seems to worry about getting an agent or a publisher or any of those tiring, tawdry things.
I hereby retire. I mean it. I will NEVER try to publish again because I am not made of the stuff that succeeds at it. I am tired of being steadily siphoned of my sense of self-worth. From now on, I write whatever dravel (blather and drivel?) I want to write, and I promise myself I will stay away from brick walls. I am 62 years old, not getting any younger, and have had my fill of humiliation.
'Scuse me while I kiss this taco.
(Post-post. Although! I will gladly sign a movie deal for Harold, and even write the film adaptation if someone will help me with it.)
Some awesome!
Dear Universe. It's Margaret here, a. k. a. The Glass Character. Now listen up. I know you're the centre of everything, in fact you encompass everything that is, was, and ever shall be. Your bounds are limitless and your scope and breadth are unknown. But I know you have time for me and what I want today: and what I want today is "some awesome"!
Never mind that no one really knows what "some awesome" means. I am totally open to it! I believe the Universe grants my every wish because I am the centre of it. Not just the world, the solar system, the galaxy, etc.: THE UNIVERSE. Everything that exists in all Creation is here to serve me, and me alone, and I am "totally open" to having the sum total of everything that exists serve up "some awesome" for me today.
I don't even have to ask.
Sunday, January 3, 2016
The $52,000.00 blankie
·
Click to open expanded view
Red Heart Plush Baby Yarn-Blueberry
by Red Heart
Be the first to review this item
Price:
CDN $5,272.03 FREE SHIPPING.
Only 3 left in stock.
Ships from and sold by Histore CA.
1 new from CDN $ 5,272.03
Red Heart NOM060580 Plush Baby Yarn, Blueberry
Weight 0.07 Kg
Price per each SKU# NOM060580
No kidding. This is how much Amazon.ca wants for a ball of blankie wool. Used to be $3.00 or $4.00, but then, like all the materials I love to work with, it has been discontinued and is rare as the dodo. I'd need about ten of them, I'd say.
But only a dodo would buy this.
Dumbest thing I ever saw on Facebook? We'll see
X-ray of dislocation -12/17/13. MRI showed torn supraspinatus tendon, axial nerve damage, possible tear in labrum but won't know until they operate Jan. 22, 2014
Without any fanfare or explanation, someone posted an x-ray of their dislocated shoulder on Facebook. We don't know why. Even more incredible is the fact that this was re-posted TWO YEARS LATER. We never found out why. To what purpose? To brag about/show off an injury? To get us all thinking just what a dislocated shoulder might mean in philosophical terms (being pulled in different directions - oh my!)? To get attention, do you think? Oooohs and ahhhhs of sympathy (which of course worked)? This is worse than posting pictures of your food, which to me makes about as much sense as posting pictures of your bowel movements. Maybe that's next. How about used surgical sponges? THAT would be nice.
Saturday, January 2, 2016
Pee Wee Herman: the Bill Cosby Connection
Reubens' 1991 arrest
In July 1991, while visiting relatives, Reubens was arrested in Sarasota, Florida, for masturbating publicly in an adult theater. Detectives would periodically visit pornographic theaters and observe the audience, arresting those engaged in indecent exposure. Reubens had not been in character for a year and a half, but because CBS was still running reruns of Pee-wee's Playhouse, Reubens' infamous mug shot, which did not depict the clean-cut look Reubens had shown for the last decade, shocked the public, and many thought that the show had been canceled due to the arrest.
The arrest was widely covered, and both the character Pee-wee and Reubens became the subject of ridicule. CBS stopped airing Playhouse and Disney-MGM Studios suspended from its studio tour a video that showed Pee-wee explaining how voice-over tracks were made and Toys-R-Us removed Pee-wee toys from its stores. However, his voice work in Disney's Star Tours was not replaced.
Despite the negative publicity, many artists who knew Reubens, such as Cyndi Lauper, Annette Funicello, Zsa Zsa Gabor and Valeria Golino, spoke out in his support. Bill Cosby defended Reubens, saying "Whatever (Reubens has) done, this is being blown all out of proportion". Other people who knew Reubens, such as Playhouse's production designer Gary Panter, S. Epatha Merkerson and Big Top Pee-wee director Randal Kleiser, also spoke out against the way Reubens was being treated by the media.
Reubens's fans also organized rallies of support after CBS canceled the scheduled reruns, with several dozens of "Pee-weeites" picketing in Los Angeles, New York and San Francisco.The general public also appeared to sympathize with Reubens – the TV newsmagazine A Current Affair received "tens of thousands" of responses to a Pee-wee telephone survey, with callers supporting Reubens with a 9-to-1 majority. He remained in a state of shock for weeks and was haunted by the arrest for several years, refusing to give interviews or appear on talk shows. - Wikipedia
Blogger's blather. I posted this admittedly-weak post because the line about Bill Cosby jumped out at me. It jumped out at me because - no, I can't refer to the pot calling the kettle black. But it's something like that.
When you think about it, though, why do people even GO to adult theatres? For the popcorn? Why do cops hang around adult theatres waiting to make an arrest as soon as they see a guy with his hand on his dick? Why do they bother, when there are assholes like Bill Cosby drugging and raping women for DECADES, and getting away with it?
People may have found the image of a children's entertainer whacking off in a porn theatre unsavory. That's because it is. I don't really want to think about ANYBODY whacking off ANYWHERE, which is not to say I am "against" it. I just don't want to think about it.
Royal Canadian Men's Historical Society and Masturbation Club, circa 1897
(NOW we know how that guy dislocated his shoulder.)
That lovin' rag
Everybody do the Michigan Rag
Everybody likes the Michigan Rag
Every Mame and Jane and Ruth
From Weehawken to Duluth
Slide, ride, glide the Michigan
Stomp, romp, pomp the Michigan
Jump, clump, pump the Michigan Rag
That lovin' rag!
My angst, my anger
I find it interesting, on this second day of the new year, that THIS is the post that probably drew the most likes on my page (53 and counting, when I normally get zero or one). It's not only just a share of someone else's post, it's highly critical of Facebook and social media mentality/narcissism. People are chiming in to agree with it, with one exception, someone who thinks it's brave of people to bare their souls like that. Hmmmmm. My brilliant Venetian vacation, my lottery win, my literary prize which I am sure I do not deserve, my new profile pic with my hair gauzily streaming in the wind (electric fan), eliciting ooohs and ahhhs, my telling people - oh so modestly - that complete strangers are stopping me in the street just to tell me how beautiful I am. And blah blah blah. Look at this, folks - look! My angst, my anger, my vanity, my conceit. There for all the world to see.
Friday, January 1, 2016
Pickle Surprise
These are the things I find in the bottom of the YouTube dustbin. Very drag-queeny stuff, and if I ever wrote anything negative about drag queens I am so sorry now, because there have been some awful repercussions. The point I was trying to make is that I had this friend (no friend of mine now, not after what he did) who was this ultra-stuffy professor with seven or eight degrees, and a much younger boy friend, and he had this negative thing about drag queens because they reminded him of his mother.
And if he didn't like women anyway, which he didn't, or not much, then why dress as one?
These are philosophical arguments only. When I see the joy drag queens evidence, I wonder where my joy has gone sometimes. I can't get that hopped up about shoes. Or anything else.
But I hope you enjoy the strangeness of this, and if not, the brevity of this, for the best videos are always under three minutes, or, even better, under two. Under one minute is the ultimate, for even if it's a total bust, you won't have wasted more than forty-five seconds of your time.
Strawberry Shortcut
This I actually like. I wish I had seen this when I was 25 years old and trying very hard to be a proper wife and mother and do all those Good Housekeeping things and failing miserably at ALL of it, as if anyone noticed or cared. This would have lifted me up, and I might even have tried this dessert, if that's what it is. Whatever else it is, it's certainly a shortcut.
Thursday, December 31, 2015
Who says 3D is new?
From King of the Mardi Gras, a 1935 Popeye cartoon. Max Fleischer was one of the great innovators of early animation. As far as I am concerned, he kicked Disney's ass. His stuff was extremely goofy and almost surreal, busting out of Disney's ultra-conventional mold. In this cartoon, the rides of the fairground are eerily realistic in the background, almost as if. . . as if they were really there.
And they were.
The whole thing was done on a turntable with miniatures. I think that's brilliant. I can't explain it as well as this paragraph I found on an animation site:
The setback rig consists of a forced-perspective, miniature set mounted on a turntable, serving as background to the cel art held in a vertical glass platen, and a horizontal animation camera. The turntable is rotated incrementally behind the cels, creating the effect of a “tracking shot” — the 2D animated character, in a side-view walk cycle, traverses a realistically proportioned (but still recognizably Fleischeresque) 3D environment which moves perspectivally across the background.
Take that, Mickey bleeping Mouse.
BUT WAIT - there's more! Information on this process isn't that easy to find, as I keep getting sidetracked by people using the term "rotoscope" (including in the comments under the original YouTube video). This is another process entirely, involving painting over live-action images.
But here it is, an actual photograph of Dave Fleischer at work with his "set-back" animation method.
How 3-D Animation Was Made Seventy Years Ago
In 1941, the Fleischer Studio constructed this elaborate three-dimensional distorted perspective set for the feature Mr. Bug Goes to Town.
Built of balsa wood and plastics, it required architect-artists four months to construct. The entire set rests on a steel turntable which can both revolve and move up and down. Drawings will be photographed a full six feet in front of the set and the combination of the “set-back” photography and the “distorted perspective” of the set will provide the illusion of third dimension, according to director Dave Fleischer, who is seen moving the set.
Blogger's reflections. From what I've picked up, Mr. Bug was watered-down Fleischer that didn't do so well at the box office, having been released on Pearl Harbour Day in 1941. Americans had more pressing things on their minds than animated bugs.
When I look at this, I see someone trying to copy Disney. Maybe it was called survival. At any rate, the one-line review I found in Rotten Tomatoes kind of shocked me.
A bizarre mess that fails at every imaginable level.
Full Review… | February 4, 2011
Film Threat
Oh, and. As a P. S. to the P. S., here's a snippet of gold: from Ali Baba and his Forty Thieves, one of those "feature-length" Popeye cartoons that lasted seventeen minutes. Beautiful, they were, and very three-dimensional.
Visit Margaret's Amazon Author Page!
TURNABOUT opening credits NBC sitcom
I keep running into this thing. I even found, sort-of, an episode, but it had two guys making comments on top of it, a form I find hard to take. Let the episode speak for itself, with its own special brand of cheesiness, rather than "Oh man! Lookit how cheesy this is!" "Awesome!". Yeah.
I have always liked animation at the start of TV sitcoms, and these reached a full flowering in the mid-to-late '60s (though there was lots of abstract stuff in the '50s). This show came later, in the '70s some time. Apparently the series lasted seven episodes. Sharon Gless and John Schuck do their best, but it's a soiled rag, folks. Actors can only do so much with material this weak/bizarre.
A new low in narcissism: Facebook quote of the day/year
"A complete stranger stopped me to say I looked beautiful. That hasn't happened in many years and it made my day."
To this person, I'd say: I wish that for just one time, you could stand inside my shoes. This is what you'd hear, and you'd probably find it intolerable:
"Hi, everybody. My beauty is so overwhelming, people literally stop me in the street just to tell me! Of course, this isn't the first time I've been stopped in the street. It used to happen to me all the time. So now I guess it has started up again. This makes my day, particularly since it is Facebook bait for dozens and dozens of gushing remarks about how beautiful I am. I mean, what else can they say?"
Who needs ipecac when you have stuff like this.
"Hi, everybody. My beauty is so overwhelming, people literally stop me in the street just to tell me! Of course, this isn't the first time I've been stopped in the street. It used to happen to me all the time. So now I guess it has started up again. This makes my day, particularly since it is Facebook bait for dozens and dozens of gushing remarks about how beautiful I am. I mean, what else can they say?"
Who needs ipecac when you have stuff like this.
Wednesday, December 30, 2015
Click this link if you dare
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXkBzTLOyjc&list=RDpXkBzTLOyjc#t=2
Click this if you dare! It kept me up all night.
Not the Proust questionnaire
Since we're in that dreadful existential hole known as Crimbo Limbo (the useless week between Christmas and New Years), I'm going to take a questionnaire I just found on Facebook.
1. Are you doing what you truly want to do?
Right now? No. Right now I'd like to be riding a white Arabian horse under a pure blaze of sunlight beside dazzling turquoise waters. In the Greek isles. And I'm not.
2. How many promises you have made and how many of them you have fulfilled?
So this says "how many promises you have made/you have fulfilled". Let me see. Just my wedding vows, though I think they were written a little more grammatically than this.
3. Will you break the rules because of something/someone you care about?
The rules? Not sure which ones, but yes.
4. Is there anything you can't let go of but you know you should?
I don't deal in "shoulds" because they immediately make me want to do the opposite. So, no. I can't let go of anything because I don't want to.
5. Do you remember anyone you hated 10 years ago? Does it matter now?
My sister. Yes.
6. If you'd die now, would you have any regrets?
"If you'd die now" can mean several things: "if you had die now", "if you did die now" or "if you would die now". So I have a creeping regret that I even started this. But, to answer the question , yes! I'd have all kinds of regrets. I really wish I could go right back to the beginning again, but be born into a different family and thus purge off all this genetic horror.
Then again, if I really died NOW I'd have no regrets, and you know why.
7. Are you afraid of making mistakes even though there's no punishments at all?
"There's no punishments at all"? Let me mention a few mistakes that may or may not lead to "no punishments at all".
You cheat on your spouse.
You're the driver in a hit-and-run accident.
You embezzle money from your workplace.
You leave your kid in his car seat while the car is running, nip into the liquor store for a quick purchase, come back after (I swear) only 15 minutes or so, and the car is gone.
When talking about mistakes and how wonderful it is to make mistakes because they teach you about life, people must mean things like "forgot to give back that Bic pen I borrowed" They can't possibly be referring to things that might leave us morally compromised or full of a gnawing, secret guilt that lasts a lifetime and blights any chance at happiness.
So yes.
8. What's the difference between you and most of the other people?
Most of "the" other people? WHICH other people? Specify if you want me to answer this!
9. Are you doing what you truly want to do?
No! I'd rather be working in a salt mine. Look at my answer to Question One, you flaming idiot!
10. If today'd be the end of the world, what'd you do?
"If today'd be the end of the world", I wouldn't be doing anything because I'd be dead like everyone else (see question 6).
Note: "today'd" can mean "today did", as in "if today did be the end of the world, or "today would", as in "if today would be the end of the world" (both nonsensical). It might even mean "if today had be the end of the world," which is totally ludicrous.
"What'd" means "what did", as in "what did you do?", or "what would", as in . . . oh never mind.
CONCLUSIONS. This is not the Proust questionnaire.
Visit Margaret's Amazon Author Page!
Wail: one bar that changed musical history
"The Rhapsody was performed by Whiteman's band, with an added section of string players, and George Gershwin on piano. Gershwin decided to keep his options open as to when Whiteman would bring in the orchestra and he did not write down one of the pages for solo piano, with only the words "Wait for nod" scrawled by Grofé on the band score. Gershwin improvised some of what he was playing, and he did not write out the piano part until after the performance, so it is unknown exactly how the original Rhapsody sounded.
The opening clarinet glissando came into being during rehearsal when; "... as a joke on Gershwin, [Ross] Gorman (Whiteman's virtuoso clarinettist) played the opening measure with a noticeable glissando, adding what he considered a humorous touch to the passage. Reacting favourably to Gorman's whimsy, Gershwin asked him to perform the opening measure that way at the concert and to add as much of a 'wail' as possible."
Tuesday, December 29, 2015
Monday, December 28, 2015
This CANNOT be true - no no no no no no NO
What is Death Cafe?
At a Death Cafe people, often strangers, gather to eat cake, drink tea and discuss death.
Our objective is 'to increase awareness of death with a view to helping people make the most of their (finite) lives'.
A Death Cafe is a group directed discussion of death with no agenda, objectives or themes. It is a discussion group rather than a grief support or counselling session.
Our Death Cafes are always offered:
- On a not for profit basis
- In an accessible, respectful and confidential space
- With no intention of leading people to any conclusion, product or course of action
- Alongside refreshing drinks and nourishing food – and cake!
If you're interested in holding a Death Cafe please see our how-to guide.
Death Cafe is a 'social franchise'. This means that people who sign up to our guide and principles can use the name Death Cafe, post events to this website and talk to the press as an affiliate of Death Cafe.
Death Cafes have spread quickly across Europe, North America and Australasia. As of today, we have offered 2653 Death Cafes since September 2011. If 10 people came to each one that would be 26530 participants. We've established both that there are people who are keen to talk about death and that many are passionate enough to organise their own Death Cafe.
The Death Cafe model was developed by Jon Underwood and Sue Barsky Reid, based on the ideas of Bernard Crettaz.
Death Cafe has no staff and is run on a voluntary basis by Jon Underwood in Hackney, East London. Also Lizzy Miles who ran the first Death Cafe in the U.S. and Megan Mooney who runs the Death Cafe Facebook page have played a significant role in Death Cafe's development.
We remain energised by the amazing quality of the dialogue at our events and are overwhelmed by the interest we have received.
People often ask why we doing this. Everyone has their own reasons for getting involved in Death Cafe. In the video below, Death Cafe Portland organiser Kate Brassington gives hers.
Our History
In 2010 Jon Underwood decided to develop a series of projects about death one of which was to focus on talking about death. In November Jon read about the work of Bernard Crettaz in the Independent newspaper. Inspired by Bernard's work, Jon immediately decided to use similar model for his own project, and Death Cafe was born.
Bernard Crettaz
The first Death Cafe in the UK was offered in Jon's house in Hackney, East London in September 2011. It was facilitated by pychotherapist Sue Barsky Reid, Jon's mum. It was a wonderful occasion. We went on to offer Death Cafes in a range of places including funky cafes, people's houses, cemeteries, a yurt and the Royal Festival Hall.
Jon and Sue Barsky Reid produced a guide to running your own Death Cafe, based around the methodology Sue developed. This was published in Feb. 2012 and first person to pick it up outside of the UK was Lizzy Miles in Columbus, Ohio. Subsequently hundreds of people have worked with us to provide Death Cafes across the globe.
Death Cafe has received some lovely media coverage including:
- Death Be Not Decaffeinated: Over Cup, Groups Face Taboo New York Times (front page!)
- Death Cafes Breathe Life Into Conversations About Dying NPR
- The death cafe movement: Tea and mortality Independent
- 'Death cafes' normalize a difficult, not morbid, topic USA Today
We are currently working to establish a real Death Cafe in London. Read more.
Death Cafe is also:
- On Facebook: facebook.com/deathcafe
- On Twitter: @deathcafe
Shout outs
Many thanks to:
Sean Legassick of Datamage who hosts the Death Cafe website for free
Phil Cooper of Petit Mal who designed the Death Cafe logo.
BLOGGER'S NOTE. This cannot be true! Perhaps it's an elaborate internet hoax. But here it is. My jaw literally dropped when I saw it. It's one of those, "well, hey, why not?" things, one of those "let's break the final taboo" things - I guess. But I wonder if people come covered in black skull tattoos and all-over flesh piercings, with Megadeath tshirts. Or pictures of Edgar Allan Poe. I wonder if they sit around in graveyards at night, spooking each other out or howling at the moon.
These are, of course, stereotypes. The only time we do "death trips" is at Halloween. Normally, when someone actually dies, it's pretty sanitized. We use terms like "passed away" or "passed on" or sometimes, as in grade school, "passed".
So is this bad or what? Is it "healthy" rather than "unhealthy"? I don't know, but I will admit my very first uncensored reaction to this site was to be shocked, offended, angry, a little queasy, and thinking "this is a whole new low in bad taste".
It's not the fact that the subject is death. I believe we need to engage with the reality of it much more deeply than we do. It's the fact that this looks like a strainingly artificial attempt to be "cool" about it. I'm not sure why this is - maybe the breezy, oh-so-normal tone of the site, which made me shake my head and think it was a parody of something-or-other - but I get this strange feeling my strong personal reaction to it would be seen as uncool or even pitiable. "You obviously carry a lot of unresolved grief. Here, let me show you how to process it so that you may at last lead a healthy and productive life."
Any group of humans contains know-it-alls, often cruel ones, and this group does not seem to have any official leadership. Thus the wounded could end up even more wounded. Then again, I am not sure emotion is encouraged in this sort of group, since the site with its skull-emblazoned china cups and black graveyard cakes seems (ironically) creepy and devoid of affect.
I find it hard to even look at this page, though I am trying to read as much of it as I can before dissing it. Maybe it's just the way the information is presented, as if they're getting together to discuss orchid species or dog breeds. This gives me the feeling that you may well have to keep grief out of it and keep the conversation on the lighter side, or at least philosophical rather than experiential. It surely does not strike me as a support group. So how do they screen out the bereaved, who may have a desperate need to talk about their feelings?
Death has swallowed some of my nearest and dearest, sucked them into the void from whence no one ever returns. Some of them have been suicides. Is this really drawing room conversation, do you think? Do these people think a combination of irony and detachment can somehow keep the horror away?
It's not the fact that the subject is death. I believe we need to engage with the reality of it much more deeply than we do. It's the fact that this looks like a strainingly artificial attempt to be "cool" about it. I'm not sure why this is - maybe the breezy, oh-so-normal tone of the site, which made me shake my head and think it was a parody of something-or-other - but I get this strange feeling my strong personal reaction to it would be seen as uncool or even pitiable. "You obviously carry a lot of unresolved grief. Here, let me show you how to process it so that you may at last lead a healthy and productive life."
Any group of humans contains know-it-alls, often cruel ones, and this group does not seem to have any official leadership. Thus the wounded could end up even more wounded. Then again, I am not sure emotion is encouraged in this sort of group, since the site with its skull-emblazoned china cups and black graveyard cakes seems (ironically) creepy and devoid of affect.
I find it hard to even look at this page, though I am trying to read as much of it as I can before dissing it. Maybe it's just the way the information is presented, as if they're getting together to discuss orchid species or dog breeds. This gives me the feeling that you may well have to keep grief out of it and keep the conversation on the lighter side, or at least philosophical rather than experiential. It surely does not strike me as a support group. So how do they screen out the bereaved, who may have a desperate need to talk about their feelings?
Dying is no tea party, people. It is an abyss, and no one comes back from it. It leaves a mark on one's life forever. The death of loved ones is far more brutalizing to contemplate than your own, which sometimes seems like a blessed release.
Howling with grief in a hospital ward, feeling your life has come to an end, finding no meaning in it whatsoever and hating the idiots who parrot at you "everything happens for a reason" - these grief reactions just don't fit into a tea party because they're signs that people aren't philosophical enough in their grief. They haven't processed it properly and need to get cracking. There's a right way to do this, and it doesn't involve collapsing in hysterics on a hospital floor. Doesn't fit very well with Peek Freans and china cups (even with skulls on them) balanced on your lap.
Tea party and death, death and tea party. The best this can be is ironic, and the worst - dreadfully insensitive. It occurs to me that this emotionally neutral approach is far worse than "he is not dead, he is just away" in dehumanizing the whole subject. At the same time, these people are dreadfully hypocritical in their claim to bring death out in the open in a "healthy" way. Healthy, I guess, so long as you aren't uncool enough to start getting all messy and emotional about it.
Can death and grief be neatly separated? Is that what we're being asked to do here? Isn't that the whole problem in our culture - that we've forgotten how to grieve when someone dies, or are simply not allowed to? Would a grieving person ever feel welcome at one of these skull-decorated-teacup soirees? If not, what the hell is wrong with the organizers?
Jesus! Do these guys really know what they are talking about?
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