The decline and fall of a spare heir

 

JAN MOIR: If Harry shovels steaming manure onto the family fruit patch, he should expect a rich crop of raspberries in return

By Jan Moir for the Daily Mail

Published: 17:58 EST, 16 November 2023 | Updated: 08:17 EST, 17 November 2023

It still seems weird and somehow wrong that news about the British Royal Family is discussed first on U.S. outlets such as talk show host Kelly Ripa's podcast and on the pages and website of People magazine — next to stories about the Kardashians and actor Will Smith denying he slept with a man.

However, this is the world the Duke and Duchess of Sussex live in, this is the prism through which they are now viewed, this is where the absurd vanilla puffery of their softest-scoop ice cream is peddled in the hope that it will be swallowed whole.

Reactions may vary, as well as recollections. Some might even choke on the first mouthful.

Omid Scobie's new book Endgame is out at the end of this month and an extract has appeared in People magazine.

American readers might be surprised to learn that, according to this highly partisan account, the death of Queen Elizabeth II was not about the passing of a much-loved monarch and a sombre moment for British people and our shared history — it was all about Prince Harry.

Although Harry and Meghan have indicated they had nothing to do with the book, there is a great deal about who told him what and when about our 96-year-old Queen's final decline.

Also his travel arrangements to Balmoral, his disappointments about this and that, his sour surprise that not only was his welcome home far from warm, but that Meghan's presence at the Queen's deathbed was surplus to requirements, too. God knows what could have caused such family froideur!

Anyone with any ideas should write them on a silenced- not-silent postcard and send it to: The Toxic Racist Windsor Rotters, c/o Broken Dog Bowl Alley, London.

According to Endgame, Harry was especially peeved that his brother did not respond to his texts when he was trying to cadge a lift to Scotland on the RAF jet that flew Prince William, Prince Andrew and the Wessexes.

You have to laugh. What did Harry expect? If you shovel endless steaming manure onto the family fruit patch, surely you must expect a rich crop of raspberries in return?

Every action has a reaction and every piece of treachery is another brick in the royal ramparts.

The walls between the brothers are now so high that apparently William refuses to even 'properly talk' with Harry, while Harry is still moping about, seeking 'an apology or accountability'. From William to him, rather than the other way around. Cue even more sardonic laughter.

No doubt more Endgame extracts and leaks will be coming soon, but I am exhausted by it already.

Dear God, surely not more Sussexian victimhood? When are they ever going to wake up and smell the wellness- focused instant latte or count their many blessings?

Harry and Meghan now have two beautiful, healthy children, a gorgeous home in California, a chicken coop, free tickets to Beyonce and Katy Perry pop concerts and millions in the bank.

They have rich and powerful supporters on their side, including billionaire television producer Tyler Perry.

It was Perry who facilitated their initial entry into America, providing his lavish California estate as a sanctuary. Not many refugees fleeing tyranny are the beneficiaries of such largesse!

Perry was on Kelly Ripa's show this week, revealing how Meghan got in touch with him after he sent her a note of support.

They had not long been friends, but that didn't stop Perry becoming Princess Lilibet's godfather.

Meghan is not the first ambitious mother who selected a wealthy and well-connected patron to become a godfather to her children — but the shock is how little it took.

A few phone calls and the loan of a house? Honey, I pimped the kids.

What I am wondering is how much more of this can we all take? Harry and Meghan have found their freedom, they have made their great escape — can't they now just enjoy it all instead of endlessly picking at the royal scab and whining to their proxy, Omid Scobie? Or to their proxy's proxy?

Of course, as a one-dimensional author of limited scope, Scobie must stoke the fires of grievance and discontent between the exiled Sussexes and the core royals, otherwise he doesn't have a book, a narrative, a purpose, or indeed a pay cheque.

Even he must be alarmed that the Duke and Duchess of Sussex are now denying that they are 'affiliated' with him in any way, although we have been here before. Denials that the Sussex camp had helped with his previous biography, Finding Freedom, turned out to be untrue.

Whatever, however, moreover — I think we can all agree that this endless drip of gripe and spite from a prince is the sign of a man who lost his way a long, long time ago.