Thursday, February 11, 2021
With glowing hearts, we see thee rise
Wednesday, February 10, 2021
Tuesday, February 9, 2021
Oh, Sister! Oh, Brother!
Oh, sister, when I come to lie in your arms
You should not treat me like a stranger
Our Father would not like the way that you act
And you must realize the danger
Oh, sister, am I not a brother to you
And one deserving of affection
And is our purpose not the same on this earth
To love and follow his direction
We grew up together
From the cradle to the grave
We died and were reborn
And then mysteriously saved
Oh, sister, when I come to knock on your door
Don't turn away, you'll create sorrow
Time is an ocean but it ends at the shore
You may not see me tomorrow
Oh, Brother! Joan Baez
You've got eyes like Jesus
But you speak with a viper's tongue
We were just sitting around on earth
Where the hell did you come from?
With your lady dressed in deerskin
And an amazing way about her
When are you going to realize
That you just can't live without her?
Take it easy
Take it light
But take it
Your lady gets her power
From the goddess and the stars
You get yours from the trees and the brooks
And a little from life on Mars
And I've known you for a good long while
And would you kindly tell me, mister
How in the name of the Father and the Son
Did I come to be your sister?
Take it easy
Take it light
But take it
You've done dirt to lifelong friends
With little or no excuses
Who endowed you with the crown
To hand out these abuses?
Your lady knows about these things
But they don't put her under
Me, I know about them, too
And I react like thunder
Take it easy
Take it light
But take it
I know you are surrounded
By parasites and sycophants
When I come to see you
I dose up on coagulants
Because when you hurl that bowie knife
It's going to be when my back is turned
Doing some little deed for you
And baby, will I get burned
Take it easy
Take it light
But take it
So little brother when you come
To knock on my door
I don't want to bring you down
But I just went through the floor
My love for you extends through life
And I don't want to waste it
But honey, what you've been dishing out
You'd never want to taste it
And if I had the nerve
To either risk it or to break it
I'd put our friendship on the line
And show you how to take it
Take it easy
Take it light
But take it
Monday, February 8, 2021
Some day you'll be able to eat this!
Saturday, February 6, 2021
Friday, February 5, 2021
The Troll Doll Channel: Troll Romance - and DISASTER!
Thursday, February 4, 2021
Tuesday, February 2, 2021
The worst item I've ever seen on eBay
We have a small discoloration on the back of the head which is somewhat red please look at the picture.
He has some texture in the body with a great face with a smile. The features on face are molded in the face.
The foot is marked Roy Des of Fla but is like it was smeared and hard to read.
He is 8.5 inches tall
Condition: |
An item that has been used
previously. See the seller’s listing for full details and description of any
imperfections. See all condition
definitions-
opens in a new window or tab |
Seller Notes: |
“This flesh colored kitchy type gingerbread doll bank
is somewhat odd, but very nice!” |
Monday, February 1, 2021
Sunday, January 31, 2021
Links to my YouTube channel, YouTube, and Blogger
Margaret Gunning magunning@telus.net
Friday, January 29, 2021
Thursday, January 28, 2021
The reality of mental illness (or: let's REALLY talk!)
Something has been bothering me, a lot, and I’ve gone back and forth on posting about it. Originally I was going to make a YouTube commentary, but couldn’t bring myself to do it without going off the deep end. Then I thought of Facebook, but knew I could get myself into all kinds of trouble there, and that’s the last thing I want.
This incident happened some months ago, when I saw a rare post from a Facebook friend whose posts never seemed to show up in my feed (and only about 10 per cent of my “friends” ever appear there. It's always the same-old. The reason? Facebook assumes that, because they're in my feed a lot, it’s what I want, so gives me “more of the same”).
In typical Facebook fashion, this is someone I know of, but don’t know personally, and with whom I have over a hundred Facebook friends in common. In part due to his platform as an edgy "alternative" arts journalist, he has been quite open about his lifelong struggles with mental illness, believing (and I truly agree with this) that this topic needs to be hauled out of the shadows where it never belonged in the first place. But something was very amiss with his post.
I went on his page to see what was going on. The posts were strange and kind of scary. He used the word “manic” several times, in a lot of different connotations (including some crude sexual references the likes of which I could not find anywhere else on his page). There were veiled and not-so-veiled references to self-destruction and violent death. This made me very uneasy, but far worse than that were the comments: the dozens of “LOLs” and “right ons” and even “awesomes”, as if his readers were finding all of it hugely entertaining.
In spite of or maybe because of the work he had done illuminating mental health issues, people apparently thought this was some kind of exuberant prank and were egging him on. Meantime, hints of suicide kept showing through. He mentioned looking down the seventeen stories of his apartment building and imagined “impaling myself on the maples below”. More LOL’s, more “right ons”, dozens of idiot emojis - and (worst of all) “Hey, we’ve all been there” (which we HAVEN’T. Nothing is more bogus and potentially dangerous as empty, false “empathy”, pretending to know what it feels like when you absolutely do NOT. It’s like saying you know about cancer from a mosquito bite.)
The posts escalated, becoming more florid and making less sense, along with photos that were increasingly alarming, until someone – a family member, I believe - posted with great urgency that anyone who had seen him should contact the family immediately. They didn’t know where he was.
Most of the comments by now expressed concern, but there were still a few dimwitted remarks (“Hey, it's all good! You’re Canada’s gonzo journalist, mate!”) People who compare someone to Hunter S. Thomson should be reminded of how his life ended, with a single gunshot wound to the head.
When the family finally announced they had called the police, most were relieved, but others still went on and on about “oh, no, you didn’t call the COPS on him!” The trouble with unburying mental illness from its airless crypt is that you uproot a whole array of primitive, ignorant, even goddamn stupid attitudes that go with it, such as denial and misperception and totally inappropriate “seeing the funny side” when it really isn’t too damn funny at all. I'm not against it, but humor about such a subject only comes in retrospect. Perspective equals time plus distance. Can you make jokes about heart disease when you’re flat on your back and fighting for your life?
There was a brief update from his brother about how grateful he was to the police for getting him safely to the hospital. This seemed to shut up the idiot Greek chorus for a while. "Police" is such a knee-jerk term, especially to jerks who don't think. The police are trained to deal with people in all kinds of distress, for all kinds of reasons, and for the most part, they do their job very well. But people still use terms that reflect very dated, primitive thinking: "they dragged him off", "they threw him in a mental hospital", etc., when very likely no person was "thrown" at all. Some still use that most horrendous and dehumanizing of terms: "they put him away". It's one of those holdovers from another century (or two) that deserves to disappear.
I see two kinds of posts on FB about the “hot topic” of mental health (the term seemingly replacing “mental illness”, which assumed you could never be well): boilerplate posts as ready-made as a microwave dinner (“Most of you won’t even bother to read this far” and “copy and paste this message, DON’T share, just to show you care!”, emoji, emoji, emoji). I always have the vague uneasy feeling that someone is making money off these things. To alleviate that vague guilt that hangs around most of us these days, people WILL copy and paste the thing, hoping they've done their bit to "raise awareness" and can just get on with their day.
The other approach is much like the “cancer awareness” thing where it seems like a bunch of cheerleaders waving pink pom-poms. In this case, God only knows where your donations end up. I’m not saying we shouldn’t address the subject - quite the opposite. But let’s really talk, talk about things that are real and painful, not spout easy platitudes and rah-rah for the team. Believe it or not, there is a time when "being positive" is the last thing you need to do.
I think depression and PTSD have largely come out of the closet, which is a start, though celebrities still “admit” they suffered from depression years and years ago (NEVER recently – that’s still too great a risk). PTSD is associated with first responders, military heroes, sometimes cops, but that’s about it. If you were sexually abused as a child and can barely function, that’s not it, it has to be called something else. Due to media emphasis and a certain level of social discomfort, PTSD has been largely claimed by heroic figures running into burning buildings. People insist they’re even more heroic for the tremendously risky act of seeking help.
I won't say much about myself because it is too excruciating, except to say that when I "disclosed" to a literary agent that I have bipolar disorder, she emailed me back with two words: "You're brave." It struck me as a remark along the lines of, "I wish I had the nerve to wear that dress." The "brave" thing was weird, because I could have bipolar disorder and be the biggest chicken on the block. Having it doesn't automatically make you "brave". So I guess she thought I was brave to have the nerve to tell her such a thing. I was left with the feeling that I had done something that had made her profoundly uncomfortable.
I like to say, and often people don’t have a clue what I mean, that when it comes to mental illness, we haven’t had our Stonewall yet. We're about where LGBTQ people were in 1970. Why do I insist on being so "negative"? Every day, people bandy about terms like “whack job”, "psycho", "fruitcake" and “nut bar”, expressing casual contempt for people who, like my Facebook friend, COULD NOT HELP his behaviour, because that is the nature of the illness. The mentally ill are the very last group of people in our culture whom you can vilify, mock and dismiss with no penalties, because no one even notices you’re doing it. We all say those things, don’t we? Why is it such a problem? It doesn’t really mean anything. Can't we say anything any more? Why are you so damned oversensitive?
I lost a beloved brother, the one confidante and support I had in a childhood lived in an emotional war zone, to the damaging effects of schizophrenia, back when all they could do for people was drug them senseless to keep them from “acting out”. And yes, sometimes we lost track of him, didn’t know where he was and had to call the police, and it was horrific. Then when the worst happened, my mother-in-law said to me in a terrible double-entendre, “at least now you know where he is.”
Why does it have to get that bad? It doesn't. If the health care system were more complete, if there were enough beds, if people would drop their mockery and horror and act human, as human as they probably could be if they tried - but I digress. My point is, what you say reflects what you think. It displays your understanding or your ignorance, not just to your Facebook friends but to the world.
Sometimes the less you say the better. Just keep it simple. Take care. I love you. Be well.
Wednesday, January 27, 2021
Why is "sight-shaming" still acceptable?
I am in a mood of mild but pervasive dread, and I'll tell you why. I have not had my eyes tested in so many years, I don't even remember. I have likely had vision problems since early childhood, though I didn't get glasses until I was eight. Since then it has been ever-stronger prescriptions, including the "progressives" I now wear for both distance and reading.
This was a long time ago, but it left me feeling so lousy the memory stayed clear (so to speak). I had the standard eye test, then handed the optician my prescription. She ever-so-slightly pulled the paper back in her hand and said, "Whoahhh." This was very up-and-down-inflected. I gave her an inquiring look, and she said, "This is really strong." I should have turned on my heel and walked out, but it was one of those things where you can't quite believe what you heard. I even got my frames from those people. Today I would report anyone who said anything like that.
But it was sight-shaming, and I do wonder - well, who the HELL in the optical business would do a thing like that? Can I HELP having very poor eyesight and wanting to correct it? It's bad enough that I already LOATHE the endless "is this one clearer, or this? Is this one clearer, or is this? Is this one clearer. . ." until I want to scream, since they all look the same. The top letter on the eye chart is blurry, and I always get a chuckle from someone over this. I have gotten used to trying to treat it like a joke.
This may be seen as humorous, but without my glasses I am close to legally blind and cannot function. If I suddenly lost them, I'd be helpless. So this is a cause for exclamations of surprise? Especially said in that "wow!" tone. So I drag my feet and even feel some anxiety and feel bad and stupid for FEELING that anxiety, because, for God's sake, that was years ago and it is only a routine eye exam!! But that is just how things are now. Bad memories are on repeat, or perhaps a better term is speed-dial, and have been for ten or eleven months now. I can't imagine why.
Tuesday, January 26, 2021
30-line TV: images from 1930 television broadcast
A stunning example of Baird's pioneering 30-line TV system, first broadcast in 1930.
(But who had a TV back then - ??)
Sunday, January 24, 2021
Shenandoah
I first heard this truly exquisite version of one of my favorite folk tunes many years ago on the radio, and tried to track it down for years. Finding it again was one of those VERY rare occasions of joyful rediscovery that happen on the internet. It is like a distillation of all the finest movie scores from those classic Westerns which idealized everything about America's tawdry, bloody, unforgiveable history. The music has a golden, shimmering translucence, and holds up a lens to view an America that never was, but which Americans still yearn for as "what might have been". But in itself, it is stunning and unabashedly glorious, and I get prickles and goose-bumps and my hair stands on end whenever I hear it. So I share it here. I'm trying my best now to put out a certain energy which runs counter to everything I feel, because I do not want to feed a dragon which could all too easily defeat me for good.