Showing posts with label movie musicals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label movie musicals. Show all posts

Saturday, April 30, 2016

All singing! All dancing! All bad!: Wedding of the Painted Doll




This was one of those posts that COULD have been among my best, if only. If only technology had allowed it.

For years I've been trying to find a decent-quality YouTube video of an extremely hokey number from Broadway Melody, often called the "first movie musical". Made in 1929, it was one of the first talkies, so nobody even knew how to record a conversation, let alone musical theatre. Everyone was still shouting into microphones hidden behind potted palms.

But that didn't stop producers from trying to cash in on the craze for "all singing! All dancing!" (All the time.) They went ahead, and for some reason pulled together some of the most mediocre performers who ever hit the stage.




My favorite number from this very strange cinematic artifact is called Wedding of the Painted Doll. Strange, because the choreography is a nightmare, and the dance performances awkward and amateurish. Who knows? Maybe only the sound mattered at this point, which was a man singing inane lyrics about - you guessed it - the wedding of the painted doll, in an annoying high tenor voice.




So I finally find a decent video of the picture part of this thing - they seem to appear, then disappear as they're taken down due to copyright restrictions, then pop up again. I couldn't make the kind of gifs I wanted because the THREE different programs I use to make gifs were all catawampus, or just not able to process the video. So I ended up with two sets of gifs from two different YouTube videos. One was extremely yellow, and cropped very badly for some reason, but much clearer in picture. The other one was framed right, but grainy and slow-mo. I had to use something called Facegarage (note the ugly watermark), which explains the rough edges of some of these.




This is interesting because the dancer in the middle "cheats" when she drops to a kneeling position: she puts her hand down to steady herself. Her "split" is awkward in that her knee comes up before it straightens. Very rough, and my nine-year-old granddaughter's dance teacher would surely yell at her for this.




This is meant to be the "parson", and he does some neat balletic things in this, though a bit later on he fluffs a move. Why, I wonder, were there no re-takes in this? Was the budget that low, or - more likely - did this have to be rushed out to meet the rabid public demand for "all-singing, all-dancing" talkies?




Here comes the bride, clomping down the stairs oh-so-daintily. Maybe the sound distracted people from such gracelessness.




The parson, once so nimble, fluffs a handstand. His left arm is wobbly and his right hand shifts, so he abandons the move like an off-balance figure skater and cartwheels off the stage.




And here the dancers are flipped one by one, until two of them are lifted and twirled around so fast it's amazing they can still stand.

And so on! The original video (which I've posted at the top) starts with a cartoon, so don't be daunted. The actual number begins at about the one-minute mark.

When mentioning the title of this number, it kept coming out Wedding of the Pained Doll. No comment on that.


Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Who will buy?




Who will buy my sweet red roses?
Two blooms for a penny.
Who will buy my sweet red roses?
Two blooms for a penny.

MILKMAID

Will you buy any milk today, mistress?
Any milk today, mistress?

ROSE SELLER

Who will buy my sweet red roses?





MILKMAID

Any milk today, mistress?

ROSE SELLER

Two blooms for a penny.

STRAWBERRY SELLER

Ripe strawberries, ripe!
Ripe strawberries, ripe!

STRAWBERRY SELLER

Ripe strawberries, ripe!





MILKMAID

Any milk today, mistress?

ROSE SELLER

Who will buy my sweet red roses?

KNIFE GRINDER

Knives, knives to grind!
Any knives to grind?
Knives, knives to grind!
Any knives to grind?
Who will buy?





STRAWBERRY SELLER

Who will buy?

MILKMAID

Who will buy?

ROSE SELLER

Who will buy?





OLIVER

Who will buy
This wonderful morning?
Such a sky
You never did see!





ROSE SELLER

Who will buy my sweet red roses?

OLIVER

Who will tie
It up with a ribbon
And put it in a box for me?





STRAWBERRY SELLER

Ripe strawberries, ripe!

OLIVER

So I could see it at my leisure
Whenever things go wrong
And I would keep it as a treasure
To last my whole life long.








MILKMAID

Any milk today?

OLIVER

Who will buy
This wonderful feeling?
I'm so high
I swear I could fly.





KNIFE GRINDER

Knives! Knives to grind!

STRAWBERRY SELLER

Ripe strawberries, ripe!





OLIVER

Me, oh my!
I don't want to lose it
So what am I to do
To keep the sky so blue?
There must be someone who will buy...





LONG SONG SELLER

Who will buy?

KNIFE GRINDER

Who will buy?

MILKMAID

Who will buy?

ROSE SELLER

Who will buy?





COMPANY AND OLIVER

Who will buy
This wonderful morning?
Such a sky
You never did see!

Who will tie
It up with a ribbon
And put it in a box for me?





There'll never be a day so sunny,
It could not happen twice.
Where is the man with all the money?
It's cheap at half the price!

Who will buy
Who will buy
This wonderful feeling?
I'm so high
I swear I could fly.
Me, oh my!
I don't want to lose it
So what am I to do
To keep the sky so blue?






OLIVER

There must be someone who will buy...

MILKMAID

Must be someone

STRAWBERRY SELLER

Must be someone

KNIFE GRINDER

Must be someone

ALL

Who will ... buy?





Songwriter

LIONEL BART

Wednesday, July 2, 2014

Something wonderful




This is a man who thinks with his heart,
His heart is not always wise.



This is a man who stumbles and falls,

But this is a man who tries.



This is a man you'll forgive and forgive
And help and protect, as long as you live.


He will not always say what you would have him say

But now and then, he'll say something wonderful.





The thoughtless things he'll do will hurt and worry you,
Then all at once, he'll do something wonderful.


He has a thousand dreams that won't come true
You know that he believes in them and that's enough for you.



You'll always go along, defend him when he's wrong

And tell him when he's strong, he is wonderful.


He'll always need your love and so he'll get your love

A man who needs your love can be wonderful.



This is a man you'll forgive and forgive

And help and protect, as long as you live.


He will not always say what you would have him say

But now and then, he'll say something wonderful.




Post-blog thoughts. This sort of welled up in me out of nowhere - no, it was somewhere. I had to trundle all the way in to Vancouver by bus today - God, it seemed like a long trudge, though I used to do it several times a week. Had to go see my doc. Had to go see my HEAD doc, as a matter of fact, who has helped me probably more than anyone else I can name, but just the fact that I GO to one is somehow ice-floe territory. But there you are. 





It wasn't quite time for my appointment on the 17th floor of this luxe building that has such a gorgeous lookout on the waterfront, it would be the ideal place to commit suicide if you could only get through that 2"-thick plate glass. At any rate, having had a bad lunch at the food fair and having a teensy bit of time left, I forced myself to walk into the "local book store" (a big impersonal chain I've called Big Booky in my posts), which I knew to be the only place that might still be carrying The Glass Character. "Still" referring to the three-month window most small-time authors get before having it all sent back to an unhappy publisher. 





Anyway, I walked past all the displays of useless high-end gift items, plus a few tables of mass mega-best-sellers by people everyone knows/no one knows, and ascended the TWO giant escalators - up, up, waaaaaaaay up - until, buried at the very back of the third floor, I found a rather small, obscure section called Fiction. And I began to hunt. Surely it wouldn't be there. But I had to look. In nine interminable years of non-publish-hood, I never again thought I would see a book of mine on a shelf in Big Booky or anywhere else (and in Vancouver, by now, there literally ISN'T "anywhere else"). And I saw the H's and I worked backwards and.



And, he was sitting there - listen. This isn't just a book. I wish you'd read it. It's a piece of my heart and it's still aching and breaking, even now. I came to be familiar with Harold the way some people must have actually known him, almost intimately. He was a heartbreaker. And I saw him up there, and oh God, and yes, there his is, by the holy. The phrase "something wonderful" kept echoing in my head after seeing him in all his blue-ness on the Big Booky shelf (and it's unlikely they have sold even one of them).

Something wonderful.




Then I thought of that melody, and couldn't get it out of my mind. I kept hunting for a good version to post here, and one didn't seem to exist. They were all oversung and schmalzed-up, the worst offender being Barbra Streisand, whose version I used to like 20 years ago. Then I found something strange - a delicate piano version, just the tune, in fact sounding more like music minus one, an accompaniment that peeled back the Broadway schmaltz to reveal the iridescence of the chords beneath.

I think Harold's character was a lot like the man in this lovely translucent song from The King and I. Then I got that yearning or craving or whatever-it-is, and because I can't make art I had to start pasting things up, to try to express some of this. I wanted to keep Harold out of it entirely, but I couldn't. If I COULD paint, maybe I never would have needed the head doc in the first place.