Saturday, April 6, 2019

"Actually, these conditions don't look very good at all, do they?"




BLOGGER'S NOTE: It's not too reassuring when the pilot of the plane comes on and tells the passengers: "I still can't see very much at the moment. Keep you informed soon as I see something that gives me a clue as to where we are. We're going down in altitude now and it won't be long before we get quite a good view." Little did they know that "quite a good view" meant crashing into the side of Mt. Erebus.

November 28, 1979
Mt. Erebus, Ross Ice Shelf, Antarctica
Air New Zealand, Flight 901
McDonnell Douglas DC-10-30
ZK-NZP

The aircraft crashed into the slopes of Mt. Erebus while on sightseeing flight to Antarctica.
An incorrect computer-stored flight plan resulted in a navigational error directing the flight
towards Mt. Erebus. Because of overcast, the crew descended below authorized altitude.
Contributing to the accident was the crew's inexperience with flying the Antarctic route.
All 257 aboard killed.

MC = McMurdo Station
CA = Captain
F/O = First Officer
F/E = Flight Engineer
MU = Mulgrew (guide)

12:18 MC We have a low overcast in the area at about 2,000ft and right now we're having some snow, but visibility is still about 40 miles and if you like I can give you an update on where the cloud areas are around the local area.

F/O Yes 901, that would be handy. We'd like to descend and maintain flight level one six zero.

MC Kiwi 901, Mac Center descend and maintain flight level one six zero.

MC 901, this is the forecaster again. It looks like the clear areas around McMurdo area are at approximately between 75 and 100 miles to the northwest of us but right now over McMurdo we have a pretty extensive low overcast. Over.

12:19 F/O Roger, New Zealand 901, thanks.

F/E That'll be round about Cape Bird, wouldn't it?

F/O Right, right.

F/E Got a low overcast over McMurdo.

CA Doesn't sound very promising, does it?

MC Within range of 40 miles of McMurdo we have radar that will, if you desire, let you down to 1,500ft on radar vectors. Over.

F/O Roger, New Zealand 901, that's acceptable.

12:20 CA That's what we want to hear.

12:31 CA I'll have to do an orbit here, I think.

CA Well actually it's clear out here if we get down.

F/E It's not clear on the right-hand side here.

F/O No.




CA If you can get HF contact tell him that we'd like further descent. We have contact with the ground and we could, if necessary, descend doing an orbit.

12:32 F/O We'd like further descent and we could orbit in our present position which is approximately 43 miles north, descending in VMC.

MC Roger Kiwi New Zealand 901, VMC descent is approved and keep Mac Center advised of your altitude.

F/O Roger, New Zealand 901, we're vacating one eight zero. We'll advise level.

12:34 CA Ladies and gentlemen. We're carrying out an orbit and circling our present position and we'll be descending to an altitude below cloud so that we can proceed to McMurdo Sound.
F/E There's Wilson.

12:35 F/O Transponder is now responding.

F/E Still no good on that frequency though?

F/O No.

F/O Roger 901, you are now loud and clear also. We are presently descending through flight level one three zero, VMC, and the intention at the moment is to descend to one zero thousand.
12:36 F/O We've lost him again.

F/O I'll go back to HF, Jim.

CA I've got to stay VMC here so I'll be doing another orbit.

12:38 F/O 901, we briefly had contact on one three four one. We've now lost contact. We're maintaining 10,000ft, presently 34 miles to the north of McMurdo.

CA Tell him we can make a visual descent on a grid of one eight zero and make a visual approach to McMurdo.

12:42 F/O 901, still negative contact on VHF. We are VMC and we'd like to let down on a grid of one eight zero and proceed visually to McMurdo.

MC New Zealand 901, maintain VMC. Keep you advised of your altitude as you approach McMurdo..

CA We're VMC around this way so I'm going to do another turn in.

CA Sorry, haven't got time to talk, but ..
.
MU Ah well, you can't talk if you can't see anything.

12:43 MU There you go. There's some land ahead.

CA I'll arm the nav again.

CA ALT, NAV CAP, IAS hold.

12:44 FO Roger, New Zealand 901, 50 miles north the base was one zero thousand. We are now at 6,000 descending to 2,000 and we're VMC.

12:45 CA We had a message from the Wright Valley and they are clear over there.

MU Oh, good.

CA So if you can get us out over that way...?

MU No trouble.

MU Taylor on the right now.

MU This is Peter Mulgrew speaking again folks. I still can't see very much at the moment. Keep you informed soon as I see something that gives me a clue as to where we are. We're going down in altitude now and it won't be long before we get quite a good view.




12:46 F/E Where's Erebus in relation to us a the moment.

MU Left, about 20 or 25 miles.

F/O Yep, yep.

F/E I'm just thinking of any high ground in the area, that's all.

MU I think it'll be left.

F/E Yes, I reckon about here.

MU Yes ... no, no, I don't really know.

12:47 MU That's the edge.

CA Yes, OK. Probably see further anyway.

F/O It's not too bad.

MU I reckon Bird's through here and Ross Island there. Erebus should be there.

CA Actually, these conditions don't look very good at all, do they?

MU No they don't
.
12:49 MU That looks like the edge of Ross Island there.

F/E I don't like this.

CA Have you got anything from him?

F/O No

CA We're 26 miles north. We'll have to climb out of this.

MU You can see Ross Island? Fine.

F/O You're clear to turn right. There's no high ground if you do a one eighty.

CA No ... negative.

GPWS [Whoop whoop pull up. Whoop whoop]

F/E Five hundred feet.

GPWS [Pull up]

F/E Four hundred feet.

GPWS [Whoop, whoop pull up. Whoop whoop pull up]

CA Go-around power please.

GPWS [Whoop whoop pull -]

[Sound of impact]




What does space sound like?





Click on full-screen symbol (bottom right) to unmute/go full-screen.


Thursday, April 4, 2019

Where Is Elizabeth Holmes Now? Inside Edition's Lisa Guerrero Tracks Her...





Yes, I KNOW I am obsessed!




This is evolving into The Elizabeth Holmes page. But really, I have never seen a case quite like this, though  others have compared her to Bernie Madoff and even Steve Jobs (whom people claim stole other people's ideas, or at least incorporated them, and mesmerized audiences into believing he had originated them). The fact she was mucking around in human blood and casually risking human life and claiming she would change the world (while everyone cheered and financial magazines put her on the cover) made this unique. She convinced so many rich, influential people to BELIEVE this twaddle that she just kept on rising, until she fell. Thank you, John Carreyrou!



Sunday, March 31, 2019

Elizabeth Holmes: yeah, and this one too (and probably more!)





After quite a long draught of Elizabeth Holmes goodies, suddenly YouTube is bursting with spot-on parodies, more than half a dozen of them appearing all at once, including one (perhaps the best of them) by a man. He probably does the voice better than any of them. It's gratifying for me to see an ice-water sociopath skewered like this, but I don't think for a moment that it bothers her. She probably secretly likes the attention. I note a distinct lack of mention of her pouty-lipped rich boy friend and the dog she calls a wolf, but then, those items didn't make the deadline for the two documentaries and the podcast. Oh my God, can I ever get enough??


Elizabeth Holmes Uncensored! Six brilliant takes (plus one)




















Tuesday, March 26, 2019

Is this the ULTIMATE Elizabeth Holmes gif?




This gif, admittedly slowed way down and somewhat blown up, nevertheless does not mess with or even exaggerate Holmes' bizarre facial expressions. Everyone remarks on those radioactively-luminous blue eyes, the eyes that never blink, which now seem borderline-disturbed, but few mention her very strange habit of tightly pursing her lips after each sentence or even each phrase. At the same time, her eyes open alarmingly, showing the white all around the iris, and a freeze-frame (below) reveals tremendous aggression and even anger. I don't know what this is all about. I've seen psychological analyses of her facial expressions and how they pertain to the sociopathy which allowed her to bleed people dry without batting an eyelash (which she never does anyway). Along with the blinklessness and the tight pursing, which one analyst called a "disgust face", she has the dangerous sanpaku eyes that make the iris look as if it is free-floating in a sea of white. According to observers, she would stare intently at people, hypnotizing them like Marshall Applewhite or some other benighted cult leader, and the amazing thing is, it worked. It mostly worked on doddering old men with too much money, but they turned out to be just what she needed. 






Monday, March 25, 2019

What are these weird holes in the ice?





I never did figure this out. Were they made from the top down, or the bottom up? Who or what made them?


TOO CUTE: pink fairy armadillo!





Death Valley Days end theme





I heard this theme in my head for YEARS - for some reason, as a kid I loved Western theme songs like The Virginian, Rawhide, Branded, Bat Masterson, and - of course! - the incomparable Western film noir, Have Gun Will Travel. But in some cases, the end theme is the main/memorable one, and harder to find. I leapt on this (a good quality one, as it turned out), and even threw in a photo of a pensive Ronald Reagan, no doubt on the verge of doing an ad for 20 Mule Team Borax. Who could ask for anything more?


Saturday, March 23, 2019

It's cherry blossom time!




This has become something of a yearly ritual. Of course I've found additional cat-and-cherry-blossom pictures since I first made this slide show, including a few which MIGHT be of the "mystery cat" which so often shows up in the Japanese cherry blossom displays. Trouble is, those tabby-and-white markings with the white spear between the eyes is extremely common. I kept running into them, wondering "is that really him?" (or her), until I finally said, why not just enjoy these pictures as they are. 


Friday, March 22, 2019

They Call it the Wrong Note Rag




"We're going down"




BLOGGER'S NOTE. How quickly things change. In a heartbeat. From discussing pretzels and fruity juice cocktail to "Hang on. What the hell is this?". In this case, it looks as if mechanical failure was at fault, but how strange, the change - from major to minor - from lighthearted banter to certain death.

September 8, 1994
Aliquippa, Pennsylvania
USAir, Flight 427
Boeing B-737-300
N513AU

On a flight from Chicago to Pittsburgh, while on approach, the aircraft went into a sudden nose dive and crashed into a wooded ravine 6 miles northwest of the airport. The accident was caused by a loss of control of the aircraft resulting from the movement of the rudder surface to its blowdown limit or an uncommanded rudder reversal. The rudder surface deflected in a direction opposite to that commanded by the pilots as a result of a jam of the main rudder PCU servo valve secondary slide to the servo valve housing offset from its neutral position and overtravel of the primary slide. All 132 aboard were killed.

CAM-1 = Captain
CAM-2 = First Officer
CAM-3 = Cockpit Area Mike (cabin sounds and flight attendants)
RDO-1 = Radio Communications (Captain)
APP: Pittsburgh Approach

CAM-3: They didn't give us connecting flight information or anything. Do you know what gate we're coming into?

CAM-1: Not yet.

CAM-3: Any idea?

CAM-1: No.

CAM-3: Do ya know what I'm thinkin' about? Pretzels.

CAM-1: Pretzels?

CAM-3: You guys need drinks here?

CAM-1: I could use a glass of somethin', whatever's open, water, uh, water, a juice?

CAM-2: I'll split a, yeah, a water, a juice, whatever's back there. I'll split one with 'im.

CAM-3: Okey-dokey. Do you want me to make you my special fruity juice cocktail?

CAM-1: How fruity is it?

CAM-3: Why don't you just try it?

CAM-2: All right, I'll be a guinea pig.

CAM-3: [Sound similar to cabin door closing]

The crew receive instructions to reduce speed to 210kts, maintain FL100 and contact Pittsburgh

Approach at 121.25.

CAM-1: Two ten, he said?

CAM-2: Two ten? Oh, I heard two fifty ...

CAM-1: I may have misunderstood him.

Pittsburgh Approach asks Flight 427 to turn left heading 100.

CAM-3: [Sound of cockpit door opening]

CAM-3: Here it is.

CAM-1: All right.

CAM-2: All right. Thank you. Thank you.

CAM-3: I didn't taste 'em, so I don't know if they came out right.

CAM-1: That's good.

CAM-2: That is good.

CAM-3: It's good.




CAM-2: That is different. Be real good with some dark rum in it.

CAM-3: Yeah, right
.
APP: USAir 427, Pittsburgh Approach. Heading 160, vector ILS Runway 28 Right final approach course speed 120.

CAM-2: What kind of speed?

RDO-1: We're comin' back to 210 and, uh, one sixty heading, down to ten, USAir 427.

CAM-1: What runway did he say?

CAM-1: It tastes like a...

CAM-2: Good.

CAM-1: There's little grapefruit in it?

CAM-3: No.

CAM-2: Cranberry?

CAM-3: Yeah. You saw that from the color.

CAM-1: Else is in it?

CAM-2: Uh, Sprite?

CAM-3: Diet Sprite.

CAM-2: Huh.

CAM-3: And I guess you could do with Sprite. Probably be a little be

RDO-1: Cleared to six, USAir 427.

CAM-2: Oh, my wife would like that.

CAM-1: Cranberry, orange, and Sprite.

CAM-2: Yeah. I guess we ought to do a preliminary.

Pre-landing checks take place; Approach requests a left turn heading 140, and speed reduction to 190kts.

CAM-3: [Sound similar to flap handle being moved; sound of single chime similar to seat belt chime]

CAM-2: Oops. I didn't kiss 'em goodbye. What was the temperature? Remember?

CAM-1: 75.

CAM-2: 75?




PA: Seatbelts and remain seated for the duration of the flight.

PA: Folks, from the flight deck, we should be on the ground in about ten more minutes. Uh, sunny skies, a little hazy. Temperature ... temperature's, ah, 75 degrees. Wind's out of the west around ten miles per hour. Certainly 'ppreciate you choosing USAir for your travel needs this evening. Hope you enjoyed the flight. Hope you come back and travel with us again. This time we'd like to ask our Flight Attendants please prepare the cabin for arrival. Ask you to check the security of your seatbelts. Thank you.

CAM-3: [Seatbelt chime]

RDO-1 : Did you say Runway 28 Left for USAir 427?

APP: Uh, USAir 427, it'll be 28 Right.

RDO-1: 28 Right, thank you.

CAM-1: 28 Right.

CAM-2: Right, 28 Right. That's what we planned on. Autobrakes on one for it.

CAM-1: Seven for six.

CAM-2: Seven for six.

CAM-1: Boy, they always slow you up so bad here.

CAM-2: That sun is gonna be just like it was takin' off in Cleveland yesterday, too. I'm just gonna close my eyes. [Sound of laughter]. You holler when it looks like we're close. [Sound of laughter]

CAM-1: Okay.

APP: USAir 427, turn left heading one zero zero. Traffic will be one to two o'clock, six miles, northbound Jetstream climbing out of thirty-three for five thousand.

RDO-1: We're looking for the traffic, turning to one zero zero, USAir 427.

CAM-3: [Sound in engines increasing rpms]

CAM-2: Oh, yeah. I see the Jetstream.




CAM-1: Sheez...

CAM-2: zuh?

CAM-3: [Sound of thump; sound like 'clickety-click'; again the thumping sound, but quieter than before]

CAM-1: Whoa ... hang on.

CAM-3: [Sound of increasing rpms in engines; sound of clickety-click; sound of trim wheel turning at autopilot trim speed; sound similar to pilot grunting; sound of wailing horn similar to autopilot disconnect warning]

CAM-1: Hang on.

CAM-2: Oh, Shit.

CAM-1: Hang on. What the hell is this?

CAM-3: [Sound of stick shaker; sound of altitude alert]

CAM-3: Traffic. Traffic.

CAM-1: What the...

CAM-2: Oh...

CAM-1: Oh God, Oh God...

APP: USAir...

RDO-1: 427, emergency!

CAM-2: [Sound of scream]

CAM-1: Pull...

CAM-2: Oh...

CAM-1: Pull... pull...

CAM-2: God...

CAM-1: [Sound of screaming]

CAM-2: No... END OF TAPE.


Tuesday, March 19, 2019

"They are not injurious": ten good reasons to smoke cocaine!






















































This ad has such sheer physical beauty that I don't want to add anything to it. At all. Except to say, if these suckers were around today, I wouldn't trust myself NOT to smoke them.They sound so fxxing GOOD, and besides, have many health benefits that I could use right now. But I won't, because at some point society became Enlightened, and smoking anything but pot (which you are now REQUIRED to smoke) became a very bad thing. So, no more Cocarettes. Which, by the way, is the best name of any product ever made in the history of humanity. 

Weird mystery! In the picture, it looks as if the smoke is coming out of the girl's ear, or perhaps even a hole in her neck. Could it be so? Just portraying a girl smoking was daring in those days. But this! 

And the more I look at it, the more this seems like a 12-year-old. Get 'em hooked early, I always say.


Sunday, March 17, 2019

"Put it in the wrong way, huh?"




BLOGGER'S NOTE. I will confess these transcripts from actual plane crashes both horrify and infuriate me - not only because they are so tragic, but because they are so - preventable. In this case, idiotic pilots fiddled around with pliers and a piece of kleenex to fix a light, not noticing the autopilot had been accidentally turned off and the plane was headed straight for "impact". The crew had FOUR minutes to correct this problem, but didn't notice it because they were too busy diddling around with the busted light. Quite literally, the plane crashed because no one was flying it. Favorite quote: "We did something to the altitude." "What?" 

December 29, 1972
Everglades National Park, Florida
Eastern Air Lines, Flight 401
Lockheed L-1011 TriStar1
N310EA


The crew was preoccupied with a landing gear problem and was trying to replace the landing
gear light while on autopilot and in a holding pattern. As the captain got up to help, he
inadvertently pushed on the yoke releasing the autopilot. With no ground reference and
under nighttime conditions, the aircraft gradually descended until it crashed into Everglades,
18.7 miles west-northwest of Miami killing 100 out of 176 aboard. The failure of the crew to
monitor the flight instruments during the final 4 minutes of flight, and to detect a descent
soon enough to prevent impact with the ground.


TWR = Tower
APP = Approach
CAM = Cockpit area mike
CAM 1 = Primarily Captain
CAM 2 = Primarily First Officer
Cam 3 = Primarily Flight Engineer
?? = unknown.
### = expletive
RT = Radio transmission


23.32:52 RT Miami Tower, do you read, Eastern 401? Just turned
on final.
23.32:56 TWR Eastern 401 Heavy, continue approach to 9 left.
23.33:00 RT Continue approach, roger.
23.33:00 CAM 3 Continuous ignition. No smoke.
CAM 1 Coming on.
CAM 3 Brake system.
CAM 1 Okay.
CAM 3 Radar.
CAM 1 Up, off.
CAM 3 Hydraulic panels checked.
CAM 2 Thirty-five, thirty three.
CAM 1 Bert, is that handle in?
CAM ? ??
CAM 3 Engine crossbleeds are open.
23.33:22 CAM ? Gear down.
CAM ? ??
CAM 1 I gotta.
CAM ? ??
23.33:25 CAM 1 I gotta raise it back up.
23.33:47 CAM 1 Now I'm gonna try it down one more time.
CAM 2 All right.
23.33:58 [sound of altitude alert horn]
CAM 2 Right gear.
CAM 2 Well, want to tell 'em we'll take it around and
circle around and ... around?
23.34:05 RDO 1 Well ah, tower, this is Eastern, ah, 401. It
looks like we're gonna have to
 circle, we don't have a light on our nose gear
yet.
23.34:14 TWR Eastern 401 heavy, roger, pull up, climb straight
ahead to two thousand,
go back to approach control, one twenty eight
six.


23.34:19 CAM 2 Twenty-two degrees.
CAM 2 Twenty-two degrees, gear up
CAM 1 Put power on it first, Bert. That-a-boy.
CAM 1 Leave the ... gear down till we find out what
we got.
CAM 2 All right.
CAM 3 You want me to test the lights or not?
CAM 1 Yeah.
CAM ? ... seat back.
CAM 1 Check it.
CAM 2 Uh, Bob, it might be the light. Could you
jiggle that, the light?
CAM 3 It's gotta, gotta come out a little bit and then
snap in.
CAM ?  ??
CAM ? I'll put 'em on.
23.34:21 RT Okay, going up to two thousand, one
twenty-eight six.
23.34:58 CAM 2 We're up to two thousand
CAM 2 You want me to fly it, Bob?











CAM 1 What frequency did he want us on, Bert?
CAM 2 One twenty-eight six.
CAM 1 I'll talk to 'em.
CAM 3 It's right ...
CAM 1 Yeah, ...
CAM 3 I can't make it pull out, either.
CAM 1 We got pressure.
CAM 3 Yes sir, all systems.
CAM 1  ??
23.35:09 RDO 1 All right ahh, Approach Control, Eastern 401,
we're right over the airport here and climbing
to two
thousand feet.in fact, we've just
23.35:20 APP Eastern 401, roger. Turn left heading three six
zero and maintain two thousand, vectors to 9
Left
final.
23.35:28 RT Left three six zero.
23.36:04 CAM 1 Put the ... on autopilot here.
CAM 2 All right.
CAM 1 See if you can get that light out.
CAM 2 All right.
CAM 1 Now push the switches just a ... forward.
CAM 1 Okay.
CAM 1 You got it sideways, then.
CAM ? Naw, I don't think it'll fit.
CAM 1 You gotta turn it one quarter turn to the
left.
23.36:27 APP Eastern 401, turn left heading three zero
zero.
RT Okay.
23.36:37 RT Three zero zero, Eastern 401.
23.37:08 CAM 1 Hey, hey, get down there and see if that damn
nose wheel's down. You better do that.
CAM 2 You got a handkerchief or something so I can
get a little better grip on this? Anything I can do
with it?
CAM 1 Get down there and see if that, see if that ### thing ...
CAM 2 This won't come out, Bob. If I had a pair of pliers,
I could cushion it with that Kleenex.
CAM 3 I can give you pliers but if you force it, you'll
break it, just believe me.
CAM 2 Yeah, I'll cushion it with Kleenex.
CAM 3 Oh, we can give you pliers.




23.37:48

APP

Eastern, uh, 401 turn left heading two seven zero.
23.37:53 RT Left two seven zero, roger.
23.38:34 CAM 1 To hell with it, to hell with this. Go down and
see if it's lined up with  the red line. That's all
we care. ### around with that ### twenty-cent piece ...
CAM ? ??
23.38:46 RT Eastern 401 I'll go ah, out west just a little further
if we can here and,  ah, see if we can get this light to
come on here.
23.38:54 APP All right, ah, we got you headed westbound there now,
Eastern 401.
23.38:56 RT All right.
CAM 1 How much fuel we got left on this ###
CAM ? Fifty two five.
CAM 2 It won't come out, no way.
23.39:37 CAM 1 Did you ever take it out of there?
CAM 2 Huh?
CAM 1 Have you ever taken it out of there?
CAM 2 Hadn't till now.
CAM 1 Put it in the wrong way, huh?
CAM 2 In there looks ... square to me.
CAM ? Can't you get the hole lined up?
CAM ? ??
CAM ? Whatever's wrong?
CAM 1 What's that?
23.40:05 CAM 2 I think that's over the training field.
CAM ? West heading you wanna go left or ...
CAM 2 Naw that's right, we're about to cross
Krome Avenue right now.
23.40:17 CAM [Sound of click]
CAM 2 I don't know what the ### holding that ### ...
CAM 2 Always something, we could'a made schedule.
23.40:38 CAM [Sound of altitude alert]







CAM 1

We can tell if that ### is down by looking
down at our indices.
CAM 1 I'm sure it's down, there's no way it couldn't
help but be.
CAM 2 I'm sure it is.
CAM 1 It freefalls down.
CAM 2 The tests didn't show that the lights worked
anyway.
CAM 1 That 's right.
CAM 2 It's a faulty light.
23.41:05 CAM 2 Bob, this ### just won't come out.
CAM 1 All right leave it there.
CAM 3 I don't see it down there.
CAM 1 Huh?
CAM 3 I don't see it.
CAM 1 You can't see that indis ... for the nose wheel ah,
there's a place in there
 you can look and see if they're lined up.
CAM 3 I know, a little like a telescope.
CAM 1 Yeah.
CAM 3 Well ...
CAM 1 It's not lined up?
CAM 3 I can't see it, it's pitch dark and I throw the little
light I get ah nothing.
23.41:31 CAM 4 Wheel-well lights on?
CAM 3 Pardon?
CAM 4 Wheel-well lights on?
CAM 3 Yeah wheel well lights always on if the gear's
down.
CAM 1 Now try it.
23.41:40 APP Eastern, ah 401 how are things coming along out
there?
23.41:44 RT Okay, we'd like to turn around and come, come
back in.
CAM 1 Clear on left?
CAM 2 Okay
23.41:47 APP Eastern 401 turn left heading one eight zero.
23.41:50 CAM 1 Huh?
23.41:51 RT One eighty.
23.42:05 CAM 2 We did something to the altitude.
CAM 1 What?
23.42:07 CAM 2 We're still at two thousand right?
23.42:09 CAM 1 Hey, what's happening here?
CAM ? [Sound of click]
23.42:10 CAM ? [Sound of six beeps similar to radio altimeter
increasing in rate]
23.42:12 [Sound of impact]


Tuesday, March 12, 2019

AGAIN I die!






In My Room

In my room, way at the end of the hall
I sit and stare at the wall
Thinking how lonesome I've grown, all alone
In my room

In my room, where every night is the same
I play a dangerous game
I keep pretending he's late
So I sit, and I wait

Over there is the picture we took when he made me his bride
Over there is the chair where he held me whenever I cried
Over there by the window, the flowers he left - have all died

In my room, way at the end of the hall
I sit and stare at the wall
Thinking how lonely I've grown, all alone
In my room


So why would I feature such a morbid little ditty on a normal, dull Tuesday afternoon? It popped into my head for no known reason today, and I assumed finding it on YouTube would be the usual breeze. It wasn't. At all. when I tried to find some, ANY recording of it, by anyone, all I could find was the Beach Boys singing:









. . . THAT song, also called In My Room. The one covered by dozens of bands, badly, because no matter how odd and strange Brian Wilson was, he sure wrote beautiful songs. 

But there HAD to be a song like the one I remembered! I heard it on the radio all the time, on CKLW ("Windsor and Detroit know/It's Radio Eight-Oh!"). I started googling "songs titled In My Room," "covers of In My Room", and finally, I got a bingo: a song by some boy group called the Walker Brothers. They had a few minor hits which I am too lazy to dig up. It was definitely the right song, but I wasn't able to listen to it all the way through because it just wasn't a guy song. It didn't sound right. The one I remembered was sung by a woman. So I had to keep digging. 

I dredged it up finally on one of those lists-of-songs pages, and even found some Youtube videos. Someone named Verdelle Smith had a modest hit with it, though I think it was the B-side of a record called Tar and Cement (which, in turn, was a knockoff of the Shangri La's You Can Never Go Home Any More).




Connie Stevens




Nancy Sinatra




Verdelle Smith


I prefer the Julie Rogers version, if only for the giant spider web on the wall and the elegant way she's dressed. I love '60s videos, usually filmed for TV variety shows (of which there were many). The song must have made some sort of minor splash for these high-end performers to do covers. But now and forever, the lyrics will bring to mind that godawful Vikki Carr song of howling female rage and loss.  





























































 




I tell myself what's done is done
I tell myself don't be a fool
Play the field have a lot of fun
It's easy when you play it cool



I tell myself don't be a chump
Who cares, let him stay away
That's when the phone rings and I jump
And as I grab the phone I pray



Let it please be him, oh dear God
It must be him or I shall die
Or I shall die


Oh hello, hello my dear God
It must be him but it's not him
And then I die
That's when I die






After a while, I'm myself again
I take the pieces off the floor
Put my heart on the shelf again
You'll never hurt me anymore



I'm not a puppet on a string
I'll find somebody else someday
That's when the phone rings, and once again
I start to pray


Let it please be him, oh dear God





must be him , it must be him
or I shall die, 
Or I shall die


Oh hello, hello my dear God
It must be him but it's not him
And then I die
Again I die