Showing posts with label bureaucracy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bureaucracy. Show all posts

Friday, November 22, 2019

Dear FTC: Please LISTEN TO ME!




(My letter to the FTC protesting the absurd, destructive new policies which YouTube is trying to force on its creators. I just can't shut up about this! It's an example of an almost Kafka-esque bureaucracy for bureaucracy's sake. I've had a channel for over 10 years, posted 1750 videos, and can't stop now. I've broken this long screed up into pieces, with my usual, appropriate visual aids from Fritz Lang's nightmarish cinematic vision, Metropolis.)






"I wish to protest against the new FTC/COPPA restrictions which YouTube will soon be passing down to their creators. Under these new restrictions, channels that endeavour to make high-quality content for kids will no longer be able to earn an income OR have their videos accessible to subscribers (due to very tight restrictions on all the features needed to allow their videos to be seen). 





Thus kid-oriented channels will be hamstrung by the very regulations which were originally intended to keep kids SAFE on YouTube. Because kids will no longer have access to their favorite high-quality kids' channels, I believe they are MORE likely go to adult-oriented content which may be inappropriate and even harmful. 




The specifications which must be applied in evaluating the correct category for our videos are EXTREMELY vague and virtually impossible to apply. If we differ from YouTube in our choice of category, which in YouTube's case is done by robots, we can be fined up to $42,000.00 PER VIDEO. 





Most YouTubers are extremely concerned about kid safety, but we CANNOT provide age-appropriate, high-quality content for kids if we have our income and all our features taken away. This has caused tremendous anxiety in the YouTube community, and the only direction we have received from YouTube if we wish to protest this potential meltdown is to "consult a lawyer". 





I am a grandmother of four and have been posting videos featuring my hobbies, collections, nature videos, family celebrations, etc. for 12 years. I am not monetized, but if I lose my channel, I will literally lose 12 years of family history and creative satisfaction. That door will likely be closed to me forever. 




YouTubers pour heart and soul into their work, and their channels are an intrinsic part of their identity. This could be the equivalent of mass firings or layoffs, for no reason that will help child safety whatsoever. PLEASE rethink this, talk to as many YouTubers as you possibly can, watch as many videos in as many categories as possible, utilize REAL people and not algorithms/bots, and try to work with YouTube to come up with something which is possible to comprehend/apply and respectful to creators. 





Without creators, there is no YouTube. With so many people going out of business, you will see a mass exodus. In effect, it could end YouTube as we know it. Surely this was not the original intent! I believe it's within your power to save the situation and make it work better for EVERYONE involved. I ask you to take another look at this entire issue, and work with YouTube AND creators to come up with regulations which make sense, actually DO protect children, and allow this whole vibrant, enthusiastic community of YouTube creators to continue." 

Your Comment Tracking Number: 1k3-9dfc-sdm7



Sunday, March 27, 2016

Knit one - no, don't knit one




This is a case of federalizing the simple.

The following is a standard, free pattern for knitting slippers, the kind everyone makes five minutes after they learn to knit -  followed by a "variation" by something called the Authentic Knitting Board. This must be some obscure organization whose purpose is to spoil the pleasure of everything you do. Kind of like the Ministry of Love, which deals in hate; the Ministry of Peace, which deals in war; etc. etc. So this must be the Ministry of Knitting, which deals in unravelling your mental health.

Original Pattern

Using two strands of wool, cast on 30 stitches.

Knit in garter stitch for a bit less than the length of your foot (they tend to stretch, so don't worry if they seem a bit tight at first).

Then in the next row, knit one, knit two together to the end of the row. The final row is knitting two stitches together all across the row.

Then break off the yarn, thread it through the remaining stitches, and pull them up. Use the rest of the yarn to sew up the top, and the casting-on yarn to sew up the heel. Repeat for second slipper.




Ministry of Knitting version: Made to Fit Double Knit Slippers

By: Authentic Knitting Board

With a few simple measurements and calculations, you will be able to make slippers for anyone, from your child’s baby doll up to Great Grandpa! Not only that, but you will be able to use any weight yarn, the stitch of your choice, and different gauge knitting boards. You truly get to be the designer. Make them big and bulky or lightweight. Design them with a stand up, bootie style, or moccasin cuff. Or, make them with no cuff at all. Stripes, novelty yarns, and different stitch patterns are all ways to make slippers that are unique. Let your imagination soar. These make great gifts, and are quick and easy. This may be the last slipper pattern you will ever need, thanks to Authentic Knitting Board!

One of our loyal readers came up with this helpful guide to creating these slippers. View the Slipper Calculations Guide to gain some valuable assistance in knitting these cute slippers.

Skill Level-Beginner

Skills Required-Casting on, Binding off, Decreasing, Stitch pattern of choice





Materials:

Double sided knitting board with the number of needles required to cast on
Yarn of choice
Notions-Yarn needle, crochet hook

Samples were made with the 28” Authentic Knitting Board with Lion Brand Chunky USA—Purple Slipper, KK Blue Long Loom with 2 strands of worsted weight yarn—Red/Blue Slipper, and Décor
Accents 12” Fine Gauge AJAL with Lion Brand Magic Stripes—Striped Slipper.

Important--Read the “Help Section” before starting.

Calculations:

The first step in making these slippers is to measure the size of the foot. Four measurements are needed (measure to the nearest ¼”): A. From the top of the ankle bone down under the heel to the top of the ankle bone on the other side. B. From the heel to the middle of the arch. C. The width of the foot at the widest part. You may want to add ½”-1” to this measurement for more ease. The amount of ease your slipper will have will vary with the stitch you choose. A stretchy stitch won’t need as much ease, while a firmer stitch will require more. The amount of ease required also depends on how snug or loose you like your slipper to fit. Adding no ease will make the slipper snug and close fitting. Experience will tell. D. From the heel to the toe. You may want to add ½”-1” to this measurement if you want “grow room.” Record these here: A._____ B._____ C._____ D._____. Make sure to measure carefully so that the slipper will turn out the right size. There is also a place to record these numbers on page 2, for ease in doing the calculations.




Now you need to make a swatch with your chosen yarn, stitch, and knitting board. I recommend casting on at least 12 needles, more for smaller gauge boards, and knitting for about 3-4 inches. Keep track of how many rows you knit. You will need that number later. Remove the swatch by binding off with a crochet hook (see step #3 in the pattern). Now, measure the width of the knitted piece. Record this here:_____. Divide this number by the number of needles cast on. Record this number here: W._____. This tells you how much knitting you get per needle. Measure the length of the knitted piece. Record this here:_____. Divide this number by the number of rows knitted. Record this number here: L._____. This tells you how much knitting you get per row. Make sure to measure carefully so that the slipper will turn out the right size.

Divide (A) by (W). Record this here:_____. Add 8 to this number. If you added some ease to (C), are using thin yarn or a fine gauge board, or you just want a taller cuff, you may want to add 10-12 to the first calculation in the place of the 8, to give you more cuff. If you want a stand up cuff, you can add 6 or less in the place of the 8. If you want a “footie” style slipper (no cuff), don’t add anything to the first number. Round to the nearest whole number. Record this here: E._____.




Divide (B) by (L). Round to the nearest whole number. Record this here: F._____.

Divide (C) by (W). Double this number. Record this number here:_____. Now, subtract this number from the total number of needles cast on (E). Round to an even number, if necessary. Record this number here:_____. Divide by 2. Record this here: G._____.

Divide (D) by (L). Record this number here:_____. Subtract (F) from this number. Record this number here:_____. Subtract 3 from this number. Record this here: H._____.

A._____ B._____ C._____ D._____ (From page 1)

Decimal equivalents for common fractions (to help with calculations): 1/8=0.125 1/4 =0.25 3/8=0.375 1/2 =0.5 5/8=0.625 3/4=0.75 7/8=0.875

Sample Slipper: For those, like me, who like to “see” what they are doing, here’s an example of using the calculations to make a slipper on a fine gauge board with worsted weight yarn. First I’ll list the measurements and then show the calculations step by step.




1. Foot Measurement: A.—7.5”, B.—3”, C.—3”, D.—6.75”

2. Swatch Measurements: W—4” / 16 needles = 0.25” L—2.5” / 13 rows = 0.2”

3. 7.5(A) / 0.25(W) = 30 8 = 38 E.—38 (Cast on stitches)

4. 3(B) / 0.2(L) = 15 F.—15 (Knit this many rows)

5. 3(C) / 0.25(W) = 12 x 2 = 24, 38(E) – 24 = 14 / 2 = 7 G.—7 (Bind off this many stitches from each end.)

6. 6.75(D) / 0.2(L) = 33.75, 33.75 – 15(F) = 18.75 – 3 = 15.75 (I’ll round this up to 16) H.—16

(Knit 16 rows)

Pattern:
Cast on (E)____ stitches with your favorite method. Leave a long tail that will be used to sew up the back of the slipper later. Instructions for the Stockinette cast-on are at the end of the pattern.
Knit (F)____ rows in stitch of choice.
Bind off (G)____ stitches on EACH end of the board. To bind off on the end opposite the working yarn, simply slip a crochet hook into the first stitch on the front and back board, and pull the first loop through the second loop. Now, pick up the next front stitch and pull it through the loop on the hook, then the next back stitch. Continue until the required number of stitches are bound off. At this point, you’ll still have one loop on your crochet hook. Place this loop on the end needle on the back board. There will now be 2 loops on the end back needle. (See top picture.) Do the same to the other side with the working yarn, but pick up the back stitch first and then the front stitch (where the working yarn is attached). Also, it is very important to lay the working yarn across the stitches as you bind off. (See middle picture.) It will be buried inside and then be right where you want it when you are finished binding off.




Knit (H)____rows. On the first row, knit 2 stitches over 1 on the two back needles that have 3 loops on them from binding off. After the first row is knitted, all the needles should have 1 loop on them. Continue knitting the remaining rows as usual.

Decrease half of the stitches. Do this by lifting stitch 1 onto needle 2 then stitch 3 onto needle 4. Repeat for the whole board, both front and back. You will end up with every other needle being empty. If you have an odd number of stitches cast on, the last 2 needles will not have an empty needle between them. Wrap the row, skipping the empty needles (see bottom picture). If an odd number of stitches are cast on, you will wrap the last 2 needles consecutively. Knit the bottom 2 stitches over the top stitch. You should now have 1 stitch on every other needle. Shuffle all the stitches together so that there are no empty needles.

Knit 1 row.

Repeat step #5, except you don’t have to shuffle all the stitches together after decreasing.
Remove slipper by cutting the working yarn, leaving a long tail. Thread the yarn tail onto a yarn needle and slip the stitches, starting with the far left back needle (the one opposite the working yarn), back and forth across the board (1A, 1B, 2A, 2B, 3A, 3B, etc.) onto the yarn needle. Remove from the board.




Finish up by binding off the cast-on stitches (if the stockinette cast-on was used). Bind off is the same as done in step #3 of the pattern starting with the stitch on the end opposite the yarn tail. After binding off the last stitch, wrap the yarn tail around the hook and pull it through the loop. The piece will look like a capital T. Fold it in half from side to side. Sew up the back seam using the long tail left from casting on. When about 1”-1 ½” (more for larger sizes, less for smaller sizes) from the bottom, bring the bottom of the slipper down to meet the seam you are sewing (this will look like a capital T—see picture below right) and finish sewing closed. This gives the back heel a nice shape. Thread the yarn tail at the toe onto a yarn needle. Run the needle back through the toe stitches again and pull tight, then sew up the top of the slipper. You can sew just the top of the slipper and leave the cuff open to fold over moccasin style, or sew all the way up the cuff and then fold over for more of a “bootie” look, or sew all the way up the cuff and leave it standing up. Weave in all the loose ends.

Turn right side out.

Congratulations!! You’re done. Now make another slipper.

Read more at http://www.favecrafts.com/Loom-Patterns/Made-to-Fit-Double-Knit-Slippers#xKr2WDGTo4Gp4UAc.99

WAIT! THERE'S MORE! I just discovered a "help section" which is meant to make this project MUCH simpler.




Help Section:

When referring to the front board, this is the board nearest you when it is lying flat. The back board is the board furthest from you when lying flat. When making your calculations, you will run into partial numbers. You can either round up or round down. A lot depends on how stretchy your stitch or yarn is, if you want to leave “grow room”, and how you like your slippers to fit. I usually round up so the slippers won’t end up too small. When calculating (W) and (L) round the number to the nearest hundredth (2 places to the right of the decimal). For example if (W)=0.34373, record 0.34. But if the number in the thousandth place is 5 or above then you would round up. So, 0.34573 would become 0.35. If you have measured correctly, your slippers should turn out the right size. If you are unsure, or just want to check your measurements, measure the knitted piece at the end of step #2 and step #5. It should be the same as (B)(after step #2) and almost (D)(after step #5). If it’s shorter, add a row or two. If it’s a little longer, you could just leave it, or you could pull back a row or two. Remember when measuring after step #5 that the piece will be a bit shorter than (D) because you still have 3 rows to knit. When in doubt, take the time to measure. You’ll be glad you did. After binding off from each end, you may have to adjust how you wrap your needles to keep your stitch pattern. For example, when using ribbing you may (not always) have to switch from (1A to 3B) to (2A to 4B) to keep in pattern. By observing the pattern in the knitting, you will be able to tell if you need to adjust your wrapping. If using stockinette stitch, this will not be a problem. When wrapping the last 3 rows, I usually switch to stockinette stitch, as it’s easier to wrap with the empty needles. For a nicer finish when sewing up the front and back seam of the fold down cuff, sew the cuff seam on the right side (outside) of the slipper. The stitches will be hidden when the cuff is folded. This applies only to the part of the seam that makes up the cuff. The rest of the top and back seam is sewn on the wrong side (inside). Any size yarn can be used, but chunky/bulky yarn will give you more thickness and last longer. Ribbing is a very nice stitch to make slippers in, as it is thick and comfortable. If you are using a larger gauge knitting board, it may be helpful to wrap the board 3 times, when casting on, and then lift the bottom loop over the top 2. Then wrap as normal, always lifting 1 over 2. This will give more thickness. Using two strands of worsted weight yarn, held together, will make a nice thick slipper and give you many color combinations. Baby booties can be made by using baby or sport weight yarn and a small or fine gauge knitting board set at ¼” spacing. For closer fitting, lightweight “footie” style slippers, sock yarn and a fine gauge knitting board work well. Crochet a chain and weave it through the cuff of the slipper and tie into a bow. Be creative!! Keep a record of your swatches. That way when you want to make a pair of slippers out of the same yarn, you’ll already have that part done.




Definitions and Stitches:

Working Yarn—The yarn attached to the skein.
Stockinette cast on and stitch—Place a slip knot on the back left needle of the board. (“Back” meaning the board furthest from you when lying flat.) Call this 1A. Bring yarn down from 1A to 2B.
(This is the front of the board.) Wrap around 2B and go back up to 3A. Continue wrapping every other needle for the desired amount of stitches. Then take the yarn straight across to the needle directly across from the needle that was wrapped last, and wrap back to the beginning, covering all the needles that are empty. Lay a long piece of yarn (this is called the anchor yarn—see picture), about twice as long as the stitches, across the stitches and then wrap again. Every needle will now have 2 loops on it. Hook the loops over by lifting the bottom loop over the top loop and off the needle. Push the ends of the anchor yarn through the boards and tie loosely under the boards. You are now cast on. Continue wrapping in this pattern for the stockinette stitch. You only lay the anchor yarn on the cast on row.

If you love making slippers, check out our 14 Cozy Crochet and Knit Slipper Patterns!

Read more at http://www.favecrafts.com/Loom-Patterns/Made-to-Fit-Double-Knit-Slippers#JBJYO8JjYyB2t2BS.99

(No, don't.)

BUT WAIT, THERE'S EVEN MORE -

Yes! The comments section echoed much of what I felt about this Byzantine pattern. (Look it up.) Only one lady complained about all the whining.  The rest were definitely indignant. Knitters are strangely protective of their craft or science, and don't want it adulterated by newfangled gizmos, thank you very much. Most of them gave it one star. My favorite comment was from the disgruntled lady who had been knitting for 71 years and could not make head-nor-tails of this thing. I think the problem is that it was filed under general knitting rather than loom knitting. They call this a "knitting board", which most people have never heard of, and which is definitely confusing: I truly thought at first that it was an organization, like the Board of Education. (A darker connotation might be waterboarding.) Given the complications, I think I'm going to give knitting boards a miss.





I can't believe that this is exactly the pattern I want to knit but, after reading all through to try an understand what it was all about, I discover it required a loom! Why on earth is it under "Knitting"?

I too was looking for a double knit slipper pattern using regular needles. I don't own a loom either

What is a knitting board??? I agree with the lady that knitted for 71 years!!

I have been looking for slipper patterns for a friend. These patterns look great. I made the mistake of copying out a couple not realizing a knitting board is required. What on earth is a knitting board first & why can't you give us some good patterns without requiring one of these boards. Very frustrating. Jan

And just what is a knitting board? Knitting is with two needles, please have this pattern for knitting and keep "novelty" crafts under a different section. Thanks




First of all, "loom knit" should have been included in the title so those who were looking for loom knitting patterns would know to look here and for those who use needles would know NOT to look at this pattern. Two, it is hard to find loom knitting patterns whereas it is not hard to find knitting patterns for needle knitting. SO, for those who don't even like the idea of knitting looms, you should go look for needle knitting patterns. There are PLENTY out there, I've seen them.

I cannot believe the whining people who are complaining about a FREE pattern. Obviously a lot of work went into this pattern whether it is for a loom or straight needles. Show a little gratitude ladies. BTW, guess how I found this pattern? I clicked on "Loom Patterns" in the sidebar. Don't believe it? Here's the address to this page where the pattern is. http://www.favecrafts.com/Loom-Patterns/Made-to-Fit-Double-Knit-Slippers/ct/1

Hello, I don't use a knitting board and really don't want to go out and purchase this high priced item. When knitting slippers, why didn't you add the directions for standard knitting instructions? It would really made this so much easier for me and everyone else to read these patterns.

Never mind knitting boards! I have been kitting the usual way for 71 years - can't you put this pattern into a straight pattern, NO "KNITTINGBOARDS"????

I have never used a knitting board. Is there a way to convert this pattern to hand knitting? Thank you!

wonderfully complete in every way! thanks

Monday, August 1, 2011

Damn, damn, damned BUREAUCRACY!


I'm going to call this "the bureaucracy of the pisspot":  in which ordinary citizens are deprived of the right to pee by the idiocy of some unholy ordinance that says city employees don't have to get out of bed on a holiday Monday.

It went like this. Today happened to be the first real day of summer we've had: more lovely and more temperate, as the poets say, than anything I've seen in many a month. It was the August long weekend, the Monday, the sweet spot, the lobster tail, the - oh, you get it, the best goddamn day in the whole summer!
So my husband and I were getting together with my son and his wife and their two flaxen-haired daughters, Erica (6) and Lauren (4). We were headed to one of our favorite places, a spray park with a playground and a pool. Nanny was looking forward to running through a solid wall of water that comes from every direction and has the same effect as shock treatment, except on your body.


And all was great as we were unpacking our picnic, and the girls were peeling their clothes off to reveal the little pink matching Hello Kitty swimsuits underneath. They were just getting nicely wet, when we noticed something kind of funny. There were hardly any people in the park.


It was odd.  A gorgeous day. A holiday Monday. A spray park, slides, swings, teeter-totters, the works. But as it turned out, one vital element was missing.

"Nanny, I have to pee." So I dutifully took Lauren's hand and took her to the washroom, grabbed the door handle and:

How do I describe the desolate, unyielding, hopeless feeling of a locked door? And just after that, the sinking realization that we wouldn't be staying at Sun Valley Spray Park for very long.


The children were not allowed to pee. Then I noticed the change rooms were locked, too. And the pool. The web site said the park was "open every day from the end of June 'til Labour Day, seven days a week". Was this the eighth day or something, or did Port Coquitlam Town Council in their infinite wisdom decide that parks should close up facilities tight on a holiday in case anyone is thinking of having a good time?


In any case, we scrambled around to try to make this work. The girls still had a shot at some fun in the spray park, though they couldn't get away with that surreptitious pee-in-the-pool trick. But we also watched a very sad parade of Moms and little kids going around the corner, having the same dreadful experience as we did, then coming around again looking - what? Anxious, angry, or worse?


Little kids (or grandmas and grandpas, for that matter) can't go very long without stopping for a pee, or something else. Boys have it a bit easier (unless it's #2 - sorry if I'm being too graphic, but human beings do have bodies, don't they?), but they still have to expose very tender parts of themselves, and girls just have an awful time of it, pee going everywhere unless they're stripped bare. And a little girl nude in a public park is just not a good idea.

But some fucking bureaucracy decided it was too much work to have someone drive over to the park with a key and save the day for dozens of Moms and Dads and their kids. People were leaving, and I knew why. Kids were wailing, either from having to hold it in too long or to cut their fun short after so much anticipation. There were groups of women standing around talking, not looking happy, and others on cell phones, basically trying to come up with a Plan B to salvage a ruined day. Their children's glorious time at the spray park had been destroyed by a locked door.


But hey, we don't need to pee, do we? How silly! And embarrassing. Or even funny, the subject of coy jokes (pee at the spray park, hee-hee-hee-hee-hee!) So why make such a big deal out of it? (This is people with no kids.) But then there's the little matter of the change rooms, also locked, so kids had to change out of their wet clothes in front of everyone, and even the wading pool which was padlocked. On a holiday Monday! On the finest day of the year.

Silly me: I thought holidays equalled recreation and frolic and good times, as the sappy Port Coquitlam web site claimed (while lying about the hours of operation, or at least not warning us that we had to keep our legs crossed all day on August 1). We made the best of it, we stayed as long as was practical, we made some effort to shield the girls while they tried to go in the bushes, but it wasn't comfortable, wasn't comfortable at all. No one wants to squat in the dirt with some adult standing like a sentry.


We went back to our place and had a lot more fun running around with sticks in the back yard, though admittedly it wasn't as wet. But this experience left a bad taste in my mouth. It was just so - I can't quite find the right words for what it was.


Stupid. Insensitive. Impractical. Unrealistic. Petty. Mean. Oblivious (to the needs of parents and kids). Hypocritical (in view of the glowing, self-congratulatory web site). And just - some sort of power thing, you know? Here I have the power to keep you locked out, to steal your good time, even as I tell you how great this facility is. There should've been a big sign on the bathroom door saying KEEP OUT, or, more appropriately, GO AWAY!


http://margaretgunnng.blogspot.com/2012/01/synopsis-glass-character-novel-by.html

http://members.shaw.ca/margaret_gunning/betterthanlife.htm